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unhipcircle494

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unhipcircle494
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 62
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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unhipcircle494's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of unhipcircle494's badges

unhipcircle494's favorite FMLs

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

#20470929
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37274) - you deserved it (3536)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by airbiscuit (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML

#20470654
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17015) - you deserved it (29656)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:32am - love - by black and yellow - United States (California)

Today, months into supporting my mum with her part time cleaning job by cooking dinner for my large family after university, I found out that she doesn't actually have a job, she just leaves the house for a few hours because she doesn't want to cook dinner. FML

#20470602
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26252) - you deserved it (1989)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:03am - work - by CollegeChef (woman) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend's mom bought us matching purity rings. FML

#20470370
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23381) - you deserved it (3668)

On 01/20/2013 at 10:55pm - love - by airrinw_33 - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my parents have kept their bet going about not turning the heat on all season. I woke up this morning to it being the same temperature inside as it was outside. It's snowing out there. FML

#20470349
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23018) - you deserved it (1176)

On 01/20/2013 at 10:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven, a dryer, a dishwasher, a toilet, and a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML

#20470154
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25946) - you deserved it (2765)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

#20469816
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23685) - you deserved it (4012)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML

#20469761
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23591) - you deserved it (5485)

On 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by megean c.l. (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

#20469621
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28088) - you deserved it (2430)

On 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by maybe dead in a day (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after an hour of crying over a guy I like, I put on some Adele and sang along. My mom quickly took notice and came to give me advice, which was to "get over it" because he doesn't want me, and that "masturbation beats relationships hands down." Gee, thanks mom. FML

#20469543
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20409) - you deserved it (4879)

On 01/20/2013 at 1:22pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML

#20469405
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14996) - you deserved it (27261)

On 01/20/2013 at 11:34am - animals - by DrakeB (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was discussing with my husband how it was time I stopped taking birth control so we could have a baby. He looked at me and said sincerely, "We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think?". He's 35 and I'm 32. FML

#20469230
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26005) - you deserved it (3440)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:13am - love - by StillTooYoung (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was reading a book in bed when my dad came to check whether or not I was asleep. To avoid any conversation, I pretended that I was. Turns out he was just checking whether he and my mom could have sex while I was fast asleep. I couldn't plug my ears in time. FML

#20468586
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22047) - you deserved it (6804)

On 01/19/2013 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I attended my aunt's open-casket funeral. My sister spent the first quarter of an hour neither grieving nor celebrating her life, but whining that the "cute" clothes my aunt was dressed in could have been handed down to her, instead of being "wasted". FML

Today, while sledding with my daughter, I tried getting her to go down a steeper slope than she's used to. She was worried she'd crash, so I went first to show her how it's done. I lost control halfway down the hill, bailed, and rolled into a tree. My wife has it on video. FML



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