unhipcircle494

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/28/2016 at 9:59pm)

unhipcircle494

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 December 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4954
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

unhipcircle494's page activity

Visits<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 12:56am<b>Psychotique</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:21pm<b>skye147</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 12:04pm<b>harmonyluver</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:45pm<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 9:39am<b>besosforme</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 10:49pm<b>AliGInTheHouse</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 5:46pm<b>BrianneL2312</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 3:07pm

unhipcircle494's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of unhipcircle494's badges

unhipcircle494's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought my first vibrator. I was really excited, until my crippling OCD kicked in, forcing me to turn it on and off seven times in rapid succession, causing it to give off a cracking sound and stop working. Now I'm sad. FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2015 at 10:01am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I got stopped by people asking for donations for their charity services. Being who I am, I hate saying no to people, so I told them "I don't have any money, only my card." Did you know they also accept payment by card? FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2015 at 9:22pm / Australia (Victoria) / Money

Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML

by Swabidizop / 05/18/2015 at 4:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I had an outdoor meeting with some important clients. It wasn't until the meeting was over that my coworker decided to inform me that I had bird poop in my hair "pretty much the entire time." FML

by lily_marleen / 05/17/2015 at 5:27pm / Germany (Bayern) / Work

Today, I went to a domestic violence counseling group. I was the only male there, and I explained that my girlfriend punches me in the face in front of my kids. Everyone started laughing. FML

by SOTS4335 / 05/16/2015 at 6:16pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, not thinking and being pissed off, I threw my phone in the car, making a decent sized crack in the windshield. FML

Today, I got my driver's license. My dad made multiple copies of his insurance cards for me to give to people when I inevitably hit them. Because "Let's face it." FML

by JillianJuneBug / 05/16/2015 at 12:16pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML

by yif2 / 05/16/2015 at 7:47am / United States / Animals

Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML

by nityasomaiya / 05/16/2015 at 1:34am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 9:17pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML

by that was mine / 05/15/2015 at 6:26pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money

Today, some genius shot through a red light, hitting my car and nearly killing me. When I went to ask if he was okay, the first words out of his mouth were "I hope you have insurance". FML

by hendrixisgod86 / 05/15/2015 at 2:48pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

by HiddlePuff / 05/14/2015 at 8:42am / Australia / Work

Today, my little cousin was helping me wash my car. After scrubbing all the dirt, I gave him the hose and said, "Okay, now rinse off this disgusting thing." He turned the hose on me. FML

by ptarr12345 / 05/14/2015 at 12:26am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids