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unfortunatewsy's favorite FMLs
by Elizabeth / 07/29/2011 at 3:56pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Smokey9 / 07/25/2011 at 11:12am / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
by quickfingers100 / 07/22/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by womanlover12345 / 07/18/2011 at 12:05pm / Spain / Love
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I had only been dating him for about a month. Thinking he wouldn't take it very hard, I invited him over so I could tell him in person. Little did I know he was going to start crying on my couch and not leave for 5 hours. FML
by me / 07/12/2011 at 12:20am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation
by NewTenant / 06/20/2011 at 3:37am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by firethorn / 06/20/2011 at 1:57am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/20/2011 at 1:45am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I spent 2 hours making the perfect card for my dad for Father's Day. When I handed it to him, he smiled and said "Thank you" and then killed a fly with it. I found it in the trash a couple of hours later. FML
by Heartbroken / 06/19/2011 at 10:17pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I purchased an app to track my period. When my mother asked me why I got it, I told her I was going to use it so I knew when to not go on a date because I don't want to be uncomfortable during a long movie. She slapped me in the face and called me a dirty prostitute and a liar. FML
by stillAvirgin:( / 06/19/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy
by youngblood / 06/19/2011 at 9:20pm / United States (Kansas) / Love
by Patrick R / 06/09/2011 at 12:01pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by wtf / 06/09/2011 at 11:04am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Health
by Username / 06/07/2011 at 2:51am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…
- Today, my economics teacher gives us a lot of photocopies, so I told her that she kills pandas by… Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that…