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unfortunatewsy

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unfortunatewsy

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 February 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1089
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About unfortunatewsy : *To be announced*

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unfortunatewsy's favorite FMLs

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55277) - you deserved it (5531) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (9346)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

#18129545
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14566) - you deserved it (33923)

On 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm - animals - by benji - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw a group of attractive guys at the mall. One of them looked exactly like a friend, so I decided to take a picture. Trying to be discreet, I put my phone up to my ear as if I was making a phone call, and pressed the capture button. The flash went off. FML

#18114247
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7930) - you deserved it (40973)

On 10/30/2011 at 7:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML

#18108392
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39752) - you deserved it (22611)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:31am - intimacy - by Korisite - United States

Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML

#18108138
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33207) - you deserved it (7513)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:02am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a god damn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML

#18092758
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28442) - you deserved it (5073)

On 10/27/2011 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to come up with a reward system for getting my boyfriend to brush his teeth daily. He's 24. FML

#18051546
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (5458)

On 10/23/2011 at 2:23am - health - by lynnie - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw my boyfriend of a year kissing another girl. When I walked up to confront him about it, he tried to convince the other girl he didn't know who I was. FML

#17989698
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39571) - you deserved it (2855)

On 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36222) - you deserved it (23307)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I caught my husband farting on my wind-chime in an attempt to make it ring. It did. FML

#17668852
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28084) - you deserved it (4241)

On 09/05/2011 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I wrote "I love you" on my girlfriend's Facebook wall. She completely freaked out and accused me of being "too clingy" and that I'm starting to feel more like a stalker than a boyfriend. FML

#17589348
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30494) - you deserved it (7146)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:11pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML

#17500518
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7637) - you deserved it (96063)

On 08/17/2011 at 2:27pm - misc - by Tom - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home from work tired and horny, and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to go make love. While all she had done all day is lay on the couch and watch television, she said, "I'm too tired, why don't you just go into the bathroom and grab a quick wank." FML

#17497068
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33625) - you deserved it (5673)

On 08/17/2011 at 2:50am - intimacy - by Frank (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31828) - you deserved it (4279)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)



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