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uglycrow

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uglycrow

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 586
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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uglycrow's favorite FMLs

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

#20423578
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50190) - you deserved it (4729)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

#20140057
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23682) - you deserved it (4165)

On 10/30/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by Obi1Shinobi - United States

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

#20136351
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29674) - you deserved it (2406)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:22am - love - by prettylady? - United States

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22607) - you deserved it (12539)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML

#20035075
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29397) - you deserved it (1721)

On 08/22/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11242) - you deserved it (37807)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, after three months of them dating, I finally met the guy my best friend claims she's in love with. To my horror, she's dating the douchebag that I had a one-night stand with a week ago. FML

#19859958
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34730) - you deserved it (6228)

On 06/28/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by … (woman) - United States

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

#19788440
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49810) - you deserved it (3363)

On 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by aranya (man) - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I woke up to a guy outside my house, who wanted to give me flowers and take me out on a date. Aside from it all being pretty fucking creepy anyway, the guy is my not quite right in the head second cousin, who's apparently now head-over-heels in love with me. FML

#19778699
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24587) - you deserved it (1951)

On 06/12/2012 at 8:24pm - love - by Az (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I volunteered at a soup kitchen. During the rounds, a grisly but nice young fellow told me that I had beautiful eyes. I was quite touched; that is until he leaned in and added, "Can I have them for my collection?" FML

#19777133
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24739) - you deserved it (1719)

On 06/12/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

#19710160
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10172) - you deserved it (29668)

On 05/31/2012 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

#19702897
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30756) - you deserved it (7436)

On 05/30/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

#19607447
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12357) - you deserved it (20344)

On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)



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