About tygerarmy : King of Queens
I'm a Ginger
US Army - Intel Analyst
Concert, Stand Up Comedy, Podcast Junkie
I ♣ baby seals!
I'm not naked I'm Tattooed
I ♥ Tattooed Girls
B Pos; it's my outlook on life, I can't help it, it's in my blood.
About tygerarmy : King of Queens
tygerarmy's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
The Thumb returns
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.
tygerarmy's favorite FMLs
Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML
by woohoo420 / 04/04/2012 at 12:14pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by justgreat / 03/23/2012 at 10:30pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I overheard a girl and a guy sitting behind me on the bus who were talking about Skyrim, one of my favourite games. After a while, I turned around and, as a fellow gamer, thanked them for restoring my faith in humanity. They went very quiet. I'm now that weird guy on the bus. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 2:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
by Anonymous / 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband sat me down on the couch so he could share some "awesome" news with me. He excitedly declared that he and his idiot drinking buddies are planning on running a real-life Fight Club out of our basement. FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 9:05pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML
by h4rdy / 03/09/2012 at 11:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by sad face / 03/07/2012 at 2:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by Gavin / 02/20/2012 at 4:19pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Intimacy
by Cheap N Happy / 02/17/2012 at 4:44am / United States / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML
by dummy / 02/16/2012 at 7:03pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, after a twelve week dry spell followed by an eight week one, I decided to take a bit more initiative at seducing my girlfriend. Not only was she "not in the mood" again, but she offered me Trident Layers gum instead. She apparently thought that it was a fair trade. FML
by dasnich / 02/04/2012 at 10:46pm / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy
Today, I finally got my stubborn toddler to take an afternoon nap after an hour and a half of wrestling with her. Ten minutes later, a UPS package arrived at my door. The UPS man decided it would be a good idea to ring my doorbell repeatedly in rapid-fire sequence as he was walking away. FML
by Insomniac / 02/02/2012 at 2:07am / United States / Kids
Today, my girlfriend started a month-long period of not talking to me. One of her male friends, who is a self-styled astrologist, told her there are "bad omens" in our relationship for the coming weeks. I don't know if I should dump her for being gullible or just plain stupid. FML
by Anonymous / 01/29/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (New York) / Love