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tygerarmy

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tygerarmy

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tygerarmytygerarmy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 September 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12090
  • Number of comments : 674
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About tygerarmy : King of Queens
I'm a Ginger
US Army - Intel Analyst
Concert, Stand Up Comedy, Podcast Junkie
I ♣ baby seals!
I'm not naked I'm Tattooed
I ♥ Tattooed Girls
B Pos; it's my outlook on life, I can't help it, it's in my blood.
Twitter/IG @TygerArmy

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tygerarmy's FML badges

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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tygerarmy's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML

#14605764
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56303) - you deserved it (4421)

On 01/16/2011 at 9:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
464 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71527) - you deserved it (3828)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after finally dropping my weight from an overweight 200 to a slim 135, my skin is now loose everywhere, and stretches about two inches out on my stomach. FML

#14350386
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31052) - you deserved it (6251)

On 12/26/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by cloud7 -

Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML

#14295570
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35406) - you deserved it (8730)

On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -

Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML

#14277581
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32176) - you deserved it (7556)

On 12/20/2010 at 9:31pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

#14205128
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23772) - you deserved it (20598)

On 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML

#14142147
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27400) - you deserved it (10450)

On 12/09/2010 at 12:15pm - love - by katy (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was making love to my fiancé, his mom walked out of the hotel bathroom and sat in a chair less than two feet away from the bed. She made idle conversation with us for the next 15 minutes. My fiancé was still inside me the entire time. FML

#13990744
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34415) - you deserved it (7321)

On 11/26/2010 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Interrupted - United States (Texas)

Today, I signed up to a Christian website in order to try and 'find God again'. I got banned. FML

#13982900
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16083) - you deserved it (24115)

On 11/26/2010 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was forced to go to the mall with my dad. He wore a bear suit the entire time. FML

#13954362
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25954) - you deserved it (4595)

On 11/23/2010 at 9:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

#13937569
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35047) - you deserved it (7831)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a restraining order from a girl I have never met. FML

#13808592
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34458) - you deserved it (3246)

On 11/11/2010 at 10:55pm - misc - by Bob - United States (Texas)

Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML

#13762266
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31340) - you deserved it (5299)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

#13733539
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8452) - you deserved it (29976)

On 11/06/2010 at 12:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was ambushed by a very angry beaver. FML

#13728170
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27782) - you deserved it (4983)

On 11/05/2010 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)



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