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twg11290

Offline (the 10/16/2014 at 7:12pm) | Search for a member

twg11290

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  • Number of visits : 746
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twg11290's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 3:55pm

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twg11290's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML

#20730822
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48883) - you deserved it (10184)

On 06/17/2013 at 1:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter found out what happens when my husband watches Mythbusters and doesn't heed the disclaimer to "Not try this at home." He feels bad about her cut face, but says he's proud he can throw a playing card that hard. FML

Today, my fiancé threatened to leave me for "bleeding too damn much." FML

#20726995
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46589) - you deserved it (4604)

On 06/15/2013 at 4:57am - love - by bloody - United States

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72978) - you deserved it (7222)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML

#20723014
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56282) - you deserved it (3155)

On 06/13/2013 at 3:05am - health - by _Tatyana_ - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

#20721430
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64035) - you deserved it (3437)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to pick up my 6-year-old son from his friend's house. They were having a great time, and he didn't want to leave. So, while I wasn't looking, he superglued both his hands to their kitchen table. FML

#20720952
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49937) - you deserved it (4993)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend asked if I could grow out my pubic hair since I usually wax it. He said his mom has a full bush and he always thought it looks better that way. FML

#20719191
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83727) - you deserved it (6894)

On 06/11/2013 at 8:00am - intimacy - by notyourmom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, in class, we were discussing stereotypes. We were asked about common ones about nearby cities. A guy said, "Well, they say Lumberton has the prettiest girls." My teacher asked if any of us were from Lumberton, so I raised my hand. The guy quickly said, "Nevermind." FML

#20717445
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54866) - you deserved it (5349)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:04pm - misc - by wellthanks (woman) - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom at work when I ran out of toilet paper. There was another guy in the restroom so I asked him if he could hand me a roll. He laughed, called me a dumbass, turned off the lights and walked out. FML

#20717345
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48910) - you deserved it (5516)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:55am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was told by my grandfather that I was no longer allowed to visit him or to set foot in his house. Why? He found out I have been taking Japanese and German as electives in my degree, so I must be an 'enemy spy'. FML

#20716829
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46959) - you deserved it (4806)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:09am - work - by Frazz (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

#20713899
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68631) - you deserved it (12931)

On 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bromley)

Today, my sister and I were having a slumber party in my room since my parents left on a trip. They left my grandparents here to watch us. It was past bed time and we started hearing some strange noises through my floor. We thought it was the radio. Turns out my grandma is a screamer. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML

#20712090
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66776) - you deserved it (9225)

On 06/07/2013 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by what the fuck (woman) - United Kingdom (Ealing)



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