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tweetypie

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tweetypie
  • Town/Country : The, Big Apple
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 January 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 679
  • Number of comments : 79
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About tweetypie : ~There is only one rain cloud in the sky...and it's raining on me. Somehow I'm not surprised.

-Eeyore-

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tweetypie's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33769) - you deserved it (109293)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally got some sleep after an exterminator came yesterday and took care of our roach problem. I woke up and kissed my boyfriend good morning. Frowning, he told me I had something stuck on the corner of my mouth. It was a roach leg. Where is the rest of the roach? FML

#1056557
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76989) - you deserved it (2747)

On 04/17/2009 at 2:43pm - misc - by wellesleybanana (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for awhile, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
850 comments

I agree, your life sucks (276937) - you deserved it (23330)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sat next to an attractive punk/rock guy on a plane. I decided to try to impress by playing music I thought he would like. I clicked The Who and opened a large window with the album cover, so he could see. The track then shuffled, and he was face to with a giant image of Miley Cyrus. FML

#333328
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11164) - you deserved it (96401)

On 03/15/2009 at 12:22am - love - by UH-OH (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, me and my boyfriend had some crazy rough sex. In the process I ended up with huge bruises and bite marks all over my neck and chest. I'm giving a speech on domestic violence today. FML

#260982
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24563) - you deserved it (78852)

On 03/10/2009 at 2:52pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML

#250417
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20548) - you deserved it (74738)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by Ethan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went to my guidance counselor and told her how I'd been fascinated with space since I was 12, had read about the universe and everything, and how I want to be an astrologist when I grow up. She stared at me for a second, before saying, "But you're... stupid." FML

#233372
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56479) - you deserved it (13728)

On 03/07/2009 at 11:10am - misc - by astroloser (woman) - Philippines (Rizal)

Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML

#194892
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6127) - you deserved it (72287)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:49am - misc - by noway6000 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML

#97434
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11672) - you deserved it (48480)

On 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)

Today, I wanted to join the bus drivers strike. I couldn't… the buses were on strike. FML

#473
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11276) - you deserved it (3705)

On 12/08/2008 at 9:03pm - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version



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