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tweetypie

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tweetypie
  • Town/Country : The, Big Apple
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 January 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 719
  • Number of comments : 79
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About tweetypie : ~There is only one rain cloud in the sky...and it's raining on me. Somehow I'm not surprised.

-Eeyore-

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tweetypie's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house to meet her entire family for the first time. Trying not to be rude, I ate their 12-bean and chorizo soup. Now I'm stuck in the bathroom trying to unclog the toilet with no plunger. FML

#17177083
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31664) - you deserved it (3561)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by PissNTra - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML

#17167728
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27542) - you deserved it (8583)

On 07/18/2011 at 8:36pm - kids - by stargirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML

#17078615
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23477) - you deserved it (2005)

On 07/12/2011 at 9:34am - misc - by Ghettogirl4life - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out that the landscaping job I started three weeks ago is actually for an illicit business run by a hippie who pissed away the entire payroll to fund his drug habit. He has no way of coughing up the $900 he owes me. I'm broke as hell, and my electricity is now going to get cut off. FML

#17032742
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29548) - you deserved it (3059)

On 07/08/2011 at 8:12pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter called for me to come into the bathroom. Turns out the tummy ache she'd been complaining of was actually parasites in her digestive tract. I could swear they were looking at me from the toilet. FML

#16432657
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29922) - you deserved it (3685)

On 05/31/2011 at 8:44am - health - by mrsekko - United States

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

#15991083
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25930) - you deserved it (15542)

On 04/30/2011 at 1:50pm - health - by Laci (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML

#15753750
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8067) - you deserved it (107864)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:01am - health - by sadcase - Australia

Today, I found a hidden camera in my room equipped with night vision and a microphone. My parents have been spying on me for at least the past year. FML

#14406121
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30278) - you deserved it (2311)

On 12/31/2010 at 4:55am - misc - by Kellie (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27981) - you deserved it (7651)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the wee hours of the morning I decided to make a naked dash to the bathroom, unfortunately, my dad decided to do the same thing at the exact same time. FML

#13874873
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29532) - you deserved it (7172)

On 11/17/2010 at 8:26am - misc - by mydadsawsooomuch (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, it was my first day back to work since having my first baby. To show I had caught up on everything, I had to give a presentation at the end of the day to the heads of my department. It went really well until the end, when one of them pointed out that breast-milk had been leaking through my clothes the entire time. FML

#13874494
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26709) - you deserved it (2102)

On 11/17/2010 at 7:09am - work - by mommy (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, on the subway, a little tipsy, I sat down next to a guy I thought was cute, hoping to enjoy some harmless flirting. I said, "Hello." He said, "May I ask you a question?" I said, "Sure." He said, "Can you please move away from me?" FML

#13797443
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8114) - you deserved it (20381)

On 11/11/2010 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML

#13293107
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33841) - you deserved it (7433)

On 10/02/2010 at 7:08pm - kids - by blah blah daddy - United States (California)

Today, I found out I won't be able to go to college. Why? My sister's horse needs surgery. FML

#12530276
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38322) - you deserved it (3408)

On 08/15/2010 at 12:12am - animals - by goodbye-college (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my future father-in-law, a respectable New England gentleman, bought me an $8,000 viola and bow for our engagement. I was so surprised that I spit a glass of wine from a 60 year old bottle all over his custom-tailored suit. He was not happy. FML

#11325945
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21509) - you deserved it (8793)

On 06/20/2010 at 2:42am - misc - by Mr.Viola (man) - United States (California)



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