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tweetypie

Offline (the 07/10/2014 at 1:37pm) | Search for a member

tweetypie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 January 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1447
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 35 posted

About tweetypie : I like cheese fries.

tweetypie's page activity

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tweetypie's favorite FMLs

Today, I popped a boner while my braces were being tightened. FML

#18309491
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33054) - you deserved it (6812)

On 11/21/2011 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I walk into my grandma's house after having a fabulous lunch with a few friends. The first thing I hear is "Be a dear and help me change my colostomy bag." I lost that fabulous lunch. FML

#18295282
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22225) - you deserved it (3583)

On 11/20/2011 at 2:37am - misc - by NoThanksGrandma (woman) -

Today, I was using the bathroom and checking Facebook on my phone. As I'm checking my news feed, I notice a new photo upload by my brother. I guess I forgot to shut the door to the bathroom, because it's me on the toilet. FML

#18291924
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15019) - you deserved it (34082)

On 11/19/2011 at 7:52pm - misc - by beccabooyah - United States

Today, I went outside for a cigarette since I don't like smoking in the house. When I was done, I stomped it out. I wasn't wearing shoes. FML

#18291679
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9071) - you deserved it (59285)

On 11/19/2011 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, a neighbor came by while I was cooking. She asked for some of my cheese, so I gave her a big slice and told her I only had cheddar. She angrily refused to accept the slice, and made her way to my fridge. She then yelled at me for not having an assortment of cheeses. FML

#18253335
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31472) - you deserved it (2928)

On 11/15/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by SetoAyumi - United States (California)

Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML

#18251877
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19815) - you deserved it (9707)

On 11/14/2011 at 11:51pm - animals - by MY CAR (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38933) - you deserved it (7731)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17994) - you deserved it (76362)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML

#18206362
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28224) - you deserved it (3469)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)

Today, the motorway I usually use was closed off due to a major car accident. With no way off the freeway, my trip took three times longer than usual. I lost control of my bladder mid-way. FML

#18175852
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24247) - you deserved it (4996)

On 11/06/2011 at 4:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, at work, my mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen, and messed up an entire day's attempted work. As I was leaving, I overheard one of my co-workers saying he'd plugged a wireless mouse adapter into my computer, and had been trolling me all day. FML

#18156228
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33674) - you deserved it (3960)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by tech_support (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML

#18123545
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28908) - you deserved it (3019)

On 10/31/2011 at 8:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's jaw was swollen due to him not taking care of a cracked tooth. He's convinced it was actually caused by an STD, and accused me of giving it to him. FML

#18005500
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29814) - you deserved it (3179)

On 10/17/2011 at 8:12am - intimacy - by STIdiot (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it's my sister's birthday. My parents got her a cat. I have serious allergies when it comes to cats. When I brought this issue up with my parents, they replied, "This day is not about you, it's about your sister." I can feel my throat tightening already. FML

#18005415
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34217) - you deserved it (2870)

On 10/17/2011 at 7:46am - health - by Cats...FML (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

#18003683
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33779) - you deserved it (2386)

On 10/17/2011 at 12:20am - health - by blarp - United States (New Jersey)



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