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tweetypie

Offline (the 07/10/2014 at 1:37pm) | Search for a member

tweetypie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 January 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1421
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 35 posted

About tweetypie : I like cheese fries.

tweetypie's page activity

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tweetypie's favorite FMLs

Today, our new boss showed up for his first day of work. I thought I'd seen it all, but he demands that we say "Hail to the King" every time he passes through the office. When I called HR about it, the guy on the other end told me to "man up and deal with it". FML

#18479274
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24184) - you deserved it (3649)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - work - by Poorman (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my dog took a dump beside the air intake for our furnace. The house now smells like dog crap. FML

#18457240
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20059) - you deserved it (3428)

On 12/07/2011 at 11:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML

#18444451
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11311) - you deserved it (43393)

On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I saw a 10 dollar bill on the street, as I went to grab it, it was pulled away by a string. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I was tricked by teenagers or that I tripped and fell as I went for it. FML

#18443890
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23051) - you deserved it (6564)

On 12/06/2011 at 9:33am - health - by aceshot97 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss asked me what language I was speaking. I was clearly speaking English, but apparently, "indifferent" is too big a word for him to understand. I don't know how he got into a management position. FML

#18443070
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22128) - you deserved it (1693)

On 12/06/2011 at 3:57am - work - by snarly1 - United States (California)

Today, I got the official word my wife is pregnant. Her sister, who lives with us, is also pregnant. I'm stuck in an apartment with two women due in late 2012. FML

#18441721
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31880) - you deserved it (4889)

On 12/06/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by brando2k5 - United States (Texas)

Today, I heard vibrating from inside my husband's desk drawer. Since he's away for the weekend, I investigated. I found an unfamiliar cellphone with an inbound call. I answered it. Turns out, it was his mistress. Neither of us can get a hold of him. FML

#18429716
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42525) - you deserved it (2881)

On 12/04/2011 at 6:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, while I was watching TV, my boyfriend took my unicorn pillow pet and made it hump my arm. I told him to stop acting like a child. He replied, "Children don't have sex like this," and started making sex noises while making the pillow pet hump my arm faster and harder. FML

#18425856
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26276) - you deserved it (9605)

On 12/04/2011 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was terribly nervous for my patient interview exam as a 4th year medical student. In my nervousness I learned that just because a patient is wearing a T-shirt and shorts, has a short hair cut and a moustache and is named 'Chris', it is not safe to assume that they are male. FML

#18410783
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28464) - you deserved it (3604)

On 12/02/2011 at 9:40am - work - by Monday (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37270) - you deserved it (3069)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's ex. I decided to be a good person and hold the door for her as we walked into the store. She decided to be the bitch she is and stomp on my foot as she walked through the open doorway. FML

#18363799
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29074) - you deserved it (6039)

On 11/27/2011 at 3:58am - love - by good citizen - United States

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30995) - you deserved it (15486)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML

#18346585
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33825) - you deserved it (7109)

On 11/25/2011 at 12:17pm - misc - by 14YearOld (man) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, things were getting heated with my girlfriend, so I tried taking her shirt off. Slapping my hands away, she said, "I was only dating you to get my self-confidence up, I'm good now." FML

#18333662
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38813) - you deserved it (3642)

On 11/24/2011 at 1:52am - intimacy - by Badab1ng - United States (Texas)

Today, when drunk, I became OCD about everything and spent 3 hours making sure that the books on my shelves were straight. I thought that being drunk was supposed to be fun. FML

#18323585
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18615) - you deserved it (7024)

On 11/23/2011 at 1:40am - health - by OCDrunk (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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