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turtles4life

Offline (the 05/28/2014 at 8:11pm) | Search for a member

turtles4life

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 394
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About turtles4life : I love animals and my pic is of my new puppy Loki! I also have a kitty and she is my baby ❤️

turtles4life's page activity

Visits<b>Goldilocks1</b> - 12 hours ago<b>TheCrispyCat</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 1:25am<b>DubiousDude69</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:38pm<b>aruam365</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:33am<b>OhNoAGhost</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 2:20am<b>snorgia</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 12:03am<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:05pm<b>Defalt</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:02am<b>TwentyFourBeerz</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 10:53pm<b>Lumen94</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:03am<b>Killz268</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:34pm<b>risktaker257</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:54am<b>mistertbawk420</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:31am<b>Denton32</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:04am<b>thomcmoore</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 3:20am<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:55pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 4:54pm<b>AnaMoore</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:53am

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turtles4life's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48815) - you deserved it (3925)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my brother and I took our cars to get oil changes. While we were there, a guy asked if we were dating. When we told him we were siblings, he responded with, "So?" FML

Today, out of boredom, I built my cat a little fort. Later, I decided to crawl inside to pet her, but as soon as I stuck my head in, she clawed me. I guess I'm not allowed in, then. FML

#21061796
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38644) - you deserved it (8515)

On 02/15/2014 at 7:50pm - animals - by unloved cat owner - United States (California)

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend's cat for staring at me, then cried about it for an hour. Pregnancy life. FML

#21056743
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42811) - you deserved it (9029)

On 02/10/2014 at 10:16pm - animals - by alii2349 - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

#21051355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41326) - you deserved it (21497)

On 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Evolution mama (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

#21050194
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53713) - you deserved it (6634)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, me and my boyfriend were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cock blocked me. FML

#21045897
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46974) - you deserved it (6998)

On 01/31/2014 at 1:16am - intimacy - by CatBlock (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42544) - you deserved it (10941)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41321) - you deserved it (12479)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

#21040159
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44516) - you deserved it (9213)

On 01/25/2014 at 11:29pm - kids - by mom - United States (Texas)

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

#21037332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36821) - you deserved it (4633)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML

#21036979
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42658) - you deserved it (14635)

On 01/23/2014 at 7:53am - misc - by MarBlu - United States

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, I noticed that the condom in my wallet has been there so long it's left a mark. FML



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