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turtkko

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turtkko
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 January 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 199
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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turtkko's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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turtkko's favorite FMLs

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55657) - you deserved it (26362)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after months of being on anti-depression medication and feeling very little emotionally, I finally felt some joy. Sadly it was from completely crushing my husband in an argument he started, where he claimed ketchup is a vegetable. FML

#21107568
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32866) - you deserved it (3827)

On 04/08/2014 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Veneto)

Today, I have pink eye. Four weeks ago I had scabies. I'm an elementary school teacher, and I'm apparently under attack from biological weapons: my students. FML

#21102371
93 comments

Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML

#21100221
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40662) - you deserved it (2963)

On 03/30/2014 at 2:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I got billed for $80 of Justin Bieber music. It wouldn't have been so bad if it were my daughter who bought it all, instead of my husband. FML

#21096936
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38886) - you deserved it (3570)

On 03/26/2014 at 2:00pm - misc - by husbands addiction - United States (California)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35772) - you deserved it (4520)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I marched in the St. Patrick's day parade. My horn has an inconveniently-placed spit valve that has to be drained frequently. At the end, I discovered every time I emptied it, it would spray all over the front of my pants. I marched an entire parade looking like I pissed my pants. FML

#21089223
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32362) - you deserved it (4547)

On 03/17/2014 at 5:48pm - misc - by Bandking (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked into my elderly client's home for my first day of work. I was immediately hit in the eye with something small, and had to get medical attention for a scratched cornea. It turns out my client likes to clip his toenails right by his front door. FML

#21088031
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36837) - you deserved it (2756)

On 03/16/2014 at 10:00am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

#21087156
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43744) - you deserved it (7876)

On 03/15/2014 at 8:21am - kids - by emergencyroom (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, a teenage girl bumped into me and my phone fell out of my hands, and over the Golden Gate Bridge. FML

#21081896
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52438) - you deserved it (5002)

On 03/09/2014 at 1:08am - misc - by Seriously? - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting my 4-year-old cousin. She scraped her knee, and in an attempt to cheer her up, I put a refrigerator box over my head and waddled around like a penguin. She stopped crying, but only after I fell down a flight of tile stairs. FML

Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML

#21073990
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32583) - you deserved it (5876)

On 02/28/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by loserr (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that no matter how much you want the Nutella, it's never a good idea to deep-throat the knife. FML

#21073034
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16753) - you deserved it (53144)

On 02/27/2014 at 9:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

#21055217
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37292) - you deserved it (6955)

On 02/09/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by took it - United States (New York)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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