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turkishjew

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turkishjew

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 546
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About turkishjew : Well if you're looking at this page then you probably want to know me and I don't blame you.
I'm a bit of a grammar nazi unless I'm just relaxing on FML. I'm an acquired taste. If you don't like me then that's you're loss. My ego is so big that it's borderline swagger. I play football, baseball, and hockey(hockey Is my favorite) I love life and I am at peace with god, what more could you ask for?

turkishjew's page activity

Visits<b>facelick</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 8:07pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 11:23pm<b>nineteen99</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 10:01pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 1:38pm<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 7:46pm<b>Jazzyw1997</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 3:54pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Girosrabing</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 7:45am<b>PretenderProfile</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 1:46am<b>merpqwertijgdv</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 10:52pm<b>SydneyGrey</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 8:48pm<b>ged</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 3:05pm<b>kegley</b> - the 11/26/2011 at 11:46am

turkishjew's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

turkishjew's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned the hard way how easy it is to get on my boss's bad side. We were talking about reality TV shows and I'd mentioned how much I despise Snooki, and how useless to the planet she is. Now I fear for my job. FML

#18008275
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27951) - you deserved it (5729)

On 10/17/2011 at 5:37pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend after helping him study for his ACT, giving him a back rub, and having really awesome sex with him. His reason for dumping me? He's too stressed out to have a girlfriend right now. FML

#17680129
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32782) - you deserved it (3986)

On 09/06/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by stupidboys - United States

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

#17664853
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26743) - you deserved it (10980)

On 09/04/2011 at 9:27pm - love - by ddll (man) - Singapore

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend masturbating furiously. To Star Trek. FML

#17657733
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38899) - you deserved it (5608)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by May - United States (New York)

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

#17641775
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25328) - you deserved it (2821)

On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was in my car with my window down at a red light. Outside, a sweet old lady was sitting on a bench with her dog sleeping next to her. I yelled out the window to tell her how cute her dog was. She replied, "He's dead" and cried. FML

#17639709
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30782) - you deserved it (4168)

On 09/01/2011 at 10:29pm - animals - by macattack (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30203) - you deserved it (3406)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, I realized my soon to be ex wife is stalking me online. Everytime I block her she creates a new profile. She left me 9 months ago. FML

#17600344
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28584) - you deserved it (2521)

On 08/28/2011 at 12:06am - love - by bubbashrek - United States

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
673 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30082) - you deserved it (49089)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML

#17566014
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30514) - you deserved it (2803)

On 08/24/2011 at 4:03am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37009) - you deserved it (3256)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

#17557500
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18764) - you deserved it (50937)

On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)

Today, I was stuck in a room with a man who was catching flies. That I could cope with, until he insisted on turning the lights out because it was 'stressing out' his flies. FML

#17546019
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20704) - you deserved it (2009)

On 08/22/2011 at 7:04am - work - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

#17534409
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28613) - you deserved it (37572)

On 08/21/2011 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Emily - United States (New York)

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30305) - you deserved it (4638)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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