trying_madly

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trying_madly

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 April 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4474
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About trying_madly : I read every single FML within about 36 hours of finding the site but there were only like 50 pages. I keep updated everyday. Yeah, i'm a loser like that.

trying_madly's page activity

Visits<b>holymacabre</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 7:48am<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 10:50am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 7:59pm<b>PlsNarwals</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:01pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:54pm<b>newyorkerkyle</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:52pm<b>noctali_Solstice</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:02pm<b>garage</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 6:19pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:07am<b>table2014</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 7:02pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 11:07am<b>abbiek2</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 6:22pm<b>Bapes</b> - the 05/14/2009 at 11:38pm<b>Absolute_Zero</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 2:16pm<b>maddog</b> - the 03/27/2009 at 11:23am<b>ClosetCelt</b> - the 03/12/2009 at 10:50pm<b>holynemesis1208</b> - the 03/11/2009 at 1:24pm<b>AKING</b> - the 03/11/2009 at 5:47am

trying_madly's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

trying_madly's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2009 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

by Hikara / 04/13/2009 at 9:44am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breaths on my neck. When I was about to finish he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck/ear and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

by bodyelectric / 04/13/2009 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

by blizzard_of_77 / 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, was the first time my boyfriend slept over. He was hard, so I woke him up by whispering in his ear, "If you could get me to do anything right now, what would it be?" His response, "Can you get me a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream?" He was hard, for ice cream. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 6:57am / Denmark (Roskilde) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2009 at 1:40am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

by douchetard / 03/26/2009 at 3:37am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a video in class about women aged 65+ and their sex lives. An elderly, blind woman was having sex at her senior's home. I don't know what's worse, watching an hour-long documentary on this, or the fact that these women are having way more sex than I am. FML

by notenoughsex / 03/19/2009 at 1:46am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

by Melaknee / 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a shower with my new boyfriend for the first time. Last night was the first night we spent together. As I was washing my hair, I looked down at my feet and noticed yellow water. Some of the warm water I felt on my feet was not from the shower head. FML

by Marcela / 03/18/2009 at 9:47am / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, he looked at me and said "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML

by myennechee / 03/18/2009 at 1:22am / Germany (Hamburg) / Intimacy

Today, me and my boyfriend were just about to have sex and I was so excited to do it just like the movies. He carried me up and just as he was about to lay me on the bed he sneezed, dropping me at the same time. I hit my head. Now I have 12 stitches where my eyebrow used to be. FML

by Misc. / 03/13/2009 at 1:54pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend and his parents. It got to an intense sex scene. I felt grateful when I saw his father reaching for the remote to fastforward past the scene. He put it into slowmotion. We watched in silence for about 3 minutes before he managed to fix it. FML

by uncomfortable / 03/11/2009 at 8:20pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy