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trying_madly

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trying_madly
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 April 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 3611
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About trying_madly : I read every single FML within about 36 hours of finding the site but there were only like 50 pages. I keep updated everyday. Yeah, i'm a loser like that.

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trying_madly's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

#1046980 (232)

I agree, your life sucks (76523) - you deserved it (5388)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592 (250)

I agree, your life sucks (77399) - you deserved it (28876)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, My girlfriend and I were watching TV, randomly she starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited she says to me "Just Joking". FML

#946704 (297)

I agree, your life sucks (109276) - you deserved it (14451)

On 04/13/2009 at 9:44am - intimacy - by Hikara (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breaths on my neck. When I was about to finish he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck/ear and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

#946038 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (84613) - you deserved it (6279)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:07am - intimacy - by bodyelectric (woman) - United States

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (30150) - you deserved it (70068)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

#837103 (577)

I agree, your life sucks (40702) - you deserved it (114326)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by FML.. (woman) - China (Hebei)

Today, was the first time my boyfriend slept over. He was hard, so I woke him up by whispering in his ear, "If you could get me to do anything right now, what would it be?" His response, "Can you get me a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream?" He was hard, for ice cream. FML

#796912 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (69363) - you deserved it (9606)

On 04/04/2009 at 6:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Denmark (Roskilde)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

#718937 (229)

I agree, your life sucks (100978) - you deserved it (9676)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

#618069 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (25806) - you deserved it (92935)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by douchetard (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to be a diplomat, I slowly say "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

#618013 (863)

I agree, your life sucks (43454) - you deserved it (361072)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:19am - misc - by Tourist (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girl handcuffed me to the bed. I willingly let her thinking we were about to have some fun. She then took my phone and read a sent message; 'Wanna hook up?' to my ex. She left me cuffed and blindfolded, and painted my nails before she left. The sent message was from before I met her. FML

#572343 (247)

I agree, your life sucks (60412) - you deserved it (41782)

On 03/24/2009 at 4:46am - intimacy - by littleman (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I saw a video in class about women aged 65+ and their sex lives. An elderly, blind woman was having sex at her senior's home. I don't know what's worse, watching an hour-long documentary on this, or the fact that these women are having way more sex than I am. FML

#459732 (67)

I agree, your life sucks (71167) - you deserved it (7410)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:46am - intimacy - by notenoughsex (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

#448904 (243)

I agree, your life sucks (23378) - you deserved it (99905)

On 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by Melaknee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking a shower with my new boyfriend for the first time. Last night was the first night we spent together. As I was washing my hair, I looked down at my feet and noticed yellow water. Some of the warm water I felt on my feet was not from the shower head. FML

#436547 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (82615) - you deserved it (13768)

On 03/18/2009 at 9:47am - intimacy - by Marcela (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, he looked at me and said "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML

#432766 (243)

I agree, your life sucks (32249) - you deserved it (68350)

On 03/18/2009 at 1:22am - intimacy - by myennechee (woman) - Germany (Hamburg)