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trinalporpus

Offline (the 02/10/2016 at 5:13am) | Search for a member

trinalporpus

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Cranbrook, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 August 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 769
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 75 posted

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trinalporpus's page activity

Visits<b>bebared</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 11:48pm<b>Klima</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 11:42am<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:15pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 7:26pm<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 5:19pm<b>shitcreeksurvr</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 6:56pm<b>netdemon</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 7:30pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 8:32am<b>andiiibandiii526</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 12:28pm<b>Purrrvana</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 9:51pm<b>liva_doll</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:49pm<b>hotel135</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 12:45am<b>lil_lex</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 2:12pm<b>captaininouille</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:59pm<b>PeachJoker</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:23am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:40am<b>PewDiePie_Lover</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 12:15am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 2:54pm

Fucked!<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:15am<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 2:29am

trinalporpus's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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trinalporpus's favorite FMLs

Today, I was jerking off quietly so my roommates wouldn't hear me. In the middle of it, one of them sent me a screenshot of an error message on a porn site, asking if I was having the same problem. I guess I wasn't being so quiet after all. FML

#21496209
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20612) - you deserved it (6147)

On 11/24/2015 at 8:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend and I were sending dirty messages to each other. We were getting really into it until she replied to one of my messages with, "Oooooh yeah." I read it in the Kool-Aid man's voice and couldn't stop laughing. Mood killed. FML

#21495829
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24578) - you deserved it (5243)

On 11/23/2015 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Stuby14 - United States (South Dakota)

Today, my gym teacher ranted about how the government should put all the death row inmates in a coliseum and film them fighting. I guess he lied when he said he only drinks at the weekend. FML

#21488729
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20953) - you deserved it (2379)

On 11/05/2015 at 10:31am - misc - by GoldenSteve - United States (Texas)

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

#21470966
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29279) - you deserved it (2982)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32854) - you deserved it (2371)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my pregnant girlfriend and I moved into our first home together, signing a 1-year lease. Less than 12 hours later, we've discovered that the place is infested with cockroaches and we have a mouse. The landlord won't let us out of the contract. FML

#21427489
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28754) - you deserved it (5033)

On 06/17/2015 at 8:14am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, my District Manager was impressed by all the appointments in my upcoming calendar. Bubbling with pride, I blurted out "Oh, I just love to have all my slots filled!" The awkward silence was only broken by "That's what she said!" from the next cubicle. FML

#21420435
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25906) - you deserved it (5402)

On 06/03/2015 at 9:59pm - work - by officeditz - United States (Florida)

Today, on my second day as a lifeguard, I locked myself out of the pool. My angry guests and I had to wait for 45 minutes for my manager to arrive and unlock the gate. FML

#21417788
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25263) - you deserved it (5628)

On 05/29/2015 at 9:34pm - work - by explosivepeach - United States (Maryland)

Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to wake me up by fingering me. Let's just say going to the ER to get your tampon dug out isn't fun. FML

#21410572
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37032) - you deserved it (3270)

On 05/15/2015 at 3:54pm - intimacy - by nazirah4shizzle (woman) - United States

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, my brother mentioned my dad's birthday party. I said, "What party?" He said, "Shit, forgot I wasn't supposed to tell you." My own father doesn't want me at his party. FML

#21385144
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31412) - you deserved it (3447)

On 04/01/2015 at 2:06am - love - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, I was fired from job as a personal trainer. Why? Because I was working out with a friend while off-duty. Apparently, working out with a friend on a day off means I am training them under the table. FML

#21384707
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32086) - you deserved it (2608)

On 03/31/2015 at 12:47pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML

#21356191
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38990) - you deserved it (3975)

On 02/14/2015 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

#21346882
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you deserved it (5830)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)



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