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totalbadass

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totalbadass

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 July 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12558
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About totalbadass : I'm a total badass.

totalbadass's page activity

Visits<b>missmandersxoxo</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 5:51am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm<b>mysmjas</b> - the 02/14/2010 at 6:25am<b>klutzilla1275</b> - the 01/15/2010 at 11:00am<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 12/31/2009 at 8:17am<b>BaBiiSpAnKy821</b> - the 12/20/2009 at 3:50am<b>xCrackerx</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 4:23am<b>Yulia</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 2:23am<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 1:34am<b>Othello22</b> - the 12/15/2009 at 10:04pm<b>haweb</b> - the 12/04/2009 at 6:38am<b>element717</b> - the 11/30/2009 at 12:23am<b>kirlia</b> - the 11/28/2009 at 11:30am<b>jc21</b> - the 11/27/2009 at 9:47pm<b>fatherpunk</b> - the 11/27/2009 at 6:07pm<b>alexandraa</b> - the 11/24/2009 at 2:12am<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 11/20/2009 at 4:07pm<b>omghehehe</b> - the 11/19/2009 at 1:07pm

totalbadass's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

totalbadass's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45588) - you deserved it (2969)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML

#6532769
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28317) - you deserved it (8664)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by SoVeryMonday (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

#2932416
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72869) - you deserved it (5394)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36078) - you deserved it (61329)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I dreamed that I met this beautiful girl at a restaurant and we ended up having lunch together. Everything was going perfect until the end when I tried to get her number and she wouldn't give it to me. I can't even get a girl in my dreams. FML

#2335998
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52682) - you deserved it (5992)

On 05/27/2009 at 5:48am - love - by xpxp2002 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went bowling. The guy at the lane next to us was bowling by himself and had a few of his own bowling balls, and he had one that looked like a yin-yang and it looked very cool spinning down the lane into the pins. Not really thinking, I casually said to him "Hey, I like your balls." FML

#2039933
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15421) - you deserved it (51700)

On 05/18/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by nothing (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31913) - you deserved it (141229)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend was sick so I took her 5 year old daughter out to eat. Half-way through our "date" she asks me loudly "Can we go back to the car now and take our clothes off?" Apparently she meant her toy dog's clothes. Face burning, we left a half laughing/half glaring crowd behind. FML

#1962553
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42502) - you deserved it (2731)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by BigBadTron (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (347153) - you deserved it (38565)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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