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100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Up and coming moderator
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Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24834) - you deserved it (4546)
On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26788) - you deserved it (3808)
On 02/10/2011 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27691) - you deserved it (5005)
On 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32929) - you deserved it (21121) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets as excited as he does when he gets a chopper gunner on Black Ops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27563) - you deserved it (5863)
On 12/21/2010 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Hannah - United States (Kansas)
Today, while working my overnight shift, I went into the isolation room to find some items for a former client. The door fell shut and the magnetic lock went to work. Both unit telephones and my cell phone were lying on the desk, and I waited four hours for my supervisor to rescue me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16979) - you deserved it (3707)
On 01/02/2010 at 8:46am - work - by ducky2721 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74203) - you deserved it (4905)
On 04/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by calliefml (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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