Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tony1891

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

tony1891

27Liked!

tony1891tony1891
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 September 1981 (33 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 3047
  • Number of comments : 548
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About tony1891 : Nos morituri te salutant

tony1891's page activity

Visits<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - yesterday at 6:36pm<b>Badman6969</b> - yesterday at 4:11pm<b>ksbrdkntr</b> - yesterday at 9:45am<b>FrutLoopDingus</b> - yesterday at 1:06am<b>shadow_heart_13</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 1:04pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 10:57am<b>LiveDreamsG</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 11:37pm<b>rich443</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 7:10pm<b>Kitty19</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 3:36pm<b>hallaaa</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 2:56am<b>Nerfherder69</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 2:19am<b>ZogerOx</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 12:41am<b>LeavenSilva</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:41pm<b>thisguy22</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 8:37pm<b>igotds</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 7:45pm<b>QueenOfSuppness</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:19pm<b>CammieMac</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 5:18pm<b>EndureAndSurvive</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 3:58pm

Liked!<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 12:58pm<b>TheMalygos</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:16am<b>kirbs19</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 9:19am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 6:17am<b>derp_taco</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 12:24am<b>devildog562</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 10:36pm<b>KaylaRox1908</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 5:14am<b>findoutmoore</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 7:32am<b>Ed1998</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 7:43pm<b>swagstatic</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 7:09pm<b>Softballchick224</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:51pm<b>then_knees</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 2:07pm<b>Han1156</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 4:24am<b>Tacogamer20</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 2:24am<b>captain_nick</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:49pm<b>arron_carrasco</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 2:50pm<b>zuka</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 5:25pm<b>Count_Coolness</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 5:55pm

tony1891's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of tony1891's badges

tony1891's favorite FMLs

Today, all day, in a huge blizzard, I've been stuck with a very nice, but very ugly, toothless and rather large and somewhat smelly woman, who has been continuously saying, "It feels like we're dating. Doesn't it feel like we're dating?" Ugh. No, no it doesn't. And please don't kill me. FML

#21344628
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21101) - you deserved it (2178)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:19pm - misc - by Yellow an (man) - United States

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer blatantly farted as I sat down, then she sneered, "Making yourself comfortable, I see..." FML

#21344008
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26493) - you deserved it (1920)

On 01/25/2015 at 1:21pm - work - by fartje - Netherlands

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

#21339686
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37805) - you deserved it (3286)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm - misc - by pissed out pants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a toaster and a fork as a wedding gift. FML

#21318970
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31679) - you deserved it (2842)

On 12/17/2014 at 2:35am - love - by monster in law. - United States

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

#21318814
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30720) - you deserved it (4836)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by thankssomuch - United States (Maine)

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24386) - you deserved it (33144)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML

#21318557
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29849) - you deserved it (6969)

On 12/16/2014 at 2:26pm - misc - by privatebathroomneeded - United States (California)

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34743) - you deserved it (6485)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I called this girl I've had a crush on for 2 years to confess my love to her. However, as she picked up the phone, I got so nervous that I froze and couldn't say a word. I was standing there, breathing heavily for 20 seconds. She got so freaked out that she threatened to call the police. FML

#21317815
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30924) - you deserved it (8189)

On 12/15/2014 at 6:59am - love - by LonelyGuy (man) - Australia

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35403) - you deserved it (4279)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, since my finals are starting tomorrow, I made a joke about setting my math books on fire. I laughed. Friends laughed. Parents laughed. Guess what subject just managed to actually get in touch with my scented candles? FML

#21315641
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25807) - you deserved it (5363)

On 12/11/2014 at 2:55pm - misc - by not laughing anymore - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was having sex when a cigarette craving came on. I don't know what's worse, the fact I asked for a cigarette break in the middle of sex or I last that long. FML

#21315600
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22924) - you deserved it (10952)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by cigarettes - United States

Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML

#21315542
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28444) - you deserved it (3228)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:10am - work - by anyoldnamewilldo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was locked out of my house. As I was about to knock on the window to ask my girlfriend to let me in, I saw her on the sofa, digging a huge booger out of her nose and eating it. FML

#21307507
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32209) - you deserved it (3997)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

#21303024
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32090) - you deserved it (15141)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: