tonijulie

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Offline (the 03/11/2016 at 4:36pm)

tonijulie

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2758
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About tonijulie : Hello, nice to see you

tonijulie's page activity

Visits<b>angrykid11</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 8:50pm<b>christinascudder</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 7:00am<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 8:12am<b>johny93</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 5:56pm<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 10:41pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 7:27pm<b>juice_33</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:48am<b>dantecarlson</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:41am<b>Katdurin</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 11:57pm<b>bigwell</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 10:01am<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 4:27pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 9:17am<b>tranced_</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 7:58am<b>Shayn_25</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 6:24pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 12:54pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 12:38am<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 6:14am<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 6:50am

Fucked!<b>johny93</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 11:56pm<b>bigwell</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 4:01pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 11:43pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 8:12pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:33pm<b>trey600rr</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 7:16pm

tonijulie's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of tonijulie's badges

tonijulie's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a box of Halloween decorations down from the attic. Inside, were a bunch of fake spiders. I emptied the box onto the floor and the "fake" spiders crawled all over the living room in opposite directions. FML

by Halloweenie / 10/16/2009 at 4:44am / United States (Hawaii) / Animals

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a bar and very drunk. I went to the urinal and when I was done I went to zip up when I realized I never unzipped. FML

by loser / 10/10/2009 at 4:45pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister was playing with her building blocks. All of a sudden, she began to cry and held her finger out to me. Assuming she had hurt it, I kissed it better, and tasted something odd on my lips. Turns out she wasn't hurt, she was crying because she had touched cat vomit. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2009 at 11:22pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML

by auscop / 09/17/2009 at 6:57am / Australia (Western Australia) / Transportation

Today, I was at the bar and my friend and I were making fun of this guy wearing a Affliction muscle tee and bedazzled Ed Hardy hat. We were saying how he was the epitome of a douche bag and that he probably likes UFC. Turns out he's an MMA fighter and I now have a broken nose. FML

by brokennose / 08/26/2009 at 12:40am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML

by litterbox_girl / 08/18/2009 at 9:13pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML

by fearofzombies / 08/13/2009 at 2:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

by JPF / 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was complaining of a scorpion sting on his leg. I told him to stop whining and get over it. Later, as I went to sleep, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. As I flipped on the light, I saw a scorpion crawling over the blankets. Now my entire arm is numb and I can't stop crying. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, as my son carried the cage with live food for his pet lizards up the stairs, I heard the sound of 2,500 baby crickets escaping. FML

by cricketeer / 08/02/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I was sitting in a coffee shop when the weird guy who had been pacing the store talking to himself approached our table. He looked at me, and in all seriousness, said, "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your butt crack is showing." FML

by Anonymous / 07/27/2009 at 9:20pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was mowing lawns for my summer job. I noticed next to me a shiny new corvette being washed by the owner. I gave a friendly wave, just as I heard a big clank as the mower blade shot a rock into the side of the car. FML

by ferrin10 / 07/26/2009 at 1:59am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to hang out with the girl I like, because she was leaving for the rest of the Summer. She had to cancel to go shopping with her grandma "all day." At 1 o'clock, she came online and told me how much fun she had with this guy I really don't like. She forgot that she lied to me. FML

by Jake / 07/25/2009 at 12:17am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML

by Mortified / 07/22/2009 at 5:48am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous