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tonijulie

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tonijulie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1193
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About tonijulie : Toni Vendero
From Tamaki Makaurau, Aotearoa
Loving life in Melbourne, Australia :)))
I believe it when I see it type of person.
Mummy to one, to the coolest kid on the planet ;)
FML is pretty much as far as I go in terms of social media.

tonijulie's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 8:59pm<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 11:38am<b>thenotsoflyguy</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 5:52pm<b>nathansmith1211</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm<b>blackheart96</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:15am<b>bdobbs1</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:24am<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 3:08am<b>nineteen99</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:14pm<b>NotR3ddy</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 9:44am<b>adrianh1090</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 2:49am<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:35pm<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 12:59am<b>shabbir87</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:57pm<b>Paradoxxxx</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 5:07am<b>runnerj116</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 10:53pm<b>capslockisgood</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 7:08pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 3:17am<b>shellykjelly</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 8:41pm

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tonijulie's favorite FMLs

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (9651)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML

#18936421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33530) - you deserved it (3038)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my teacher, who's Irish, called me insensitive and stupid for imitating her accent. I'm Filipino and my parents immigrated to Ireland where I was born, and then we moved to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML

#18841081
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35988) - you deserved it (2616)

On 01/18/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by meh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out the girl I've been fooling around with for two weeks has a boyfriend, who is in jail, and is a member of the Aryan Brotherhood. FML

#18833133
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35559) - you deserved it (6799)

On 01/17/2012 at 6:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

#18822523
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34888) - you deserved it (14241)

On 01/16/2012 at 6:09am - love - by Crashburn (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML

#18725237
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24319) - you deserved it (8604)

On 01/06/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had shelves installed using a builder who came highly recommended by my co-worker. Turns out the builder is her friend, who has no actual qualifications or experience as a builder, but 'it's his dream'. I now have a gaping hole in my kitchen where the shelves should be. FML

#18719100
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22018) - you deserved it (4762)

On 01/05/2012 at 7:37pm - misc - by neveragain89 (woman) - Australia

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

#18643236
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28419) - you deserved it (5013)

On 12/29/2011 at 10:48am - health - by OH COME ON (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31555) - you deserved it (5883) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

#18410529
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35595) - you deserved it (6056)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:22am - kids - by jessi - United States

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34379) - you deserved it (6025)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML

#18216431
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27973) - you deserved it (7339)

On 11/11/2011 at 3:42am - health - by devinchi (man) - United States

Today, I learned if you dream you're having a piss, you most likely are having a piss. FML

#18163240
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38925) - you deserved it (5268)

On 11/05/2011 at 9:43am - health - by rj93 - United Kingdom (Ballymena)

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

#18083202
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40578) - you deserved it (5230)

On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML

#17966458
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11764) - you deserved it (41660)

On 10/12/2011 at 8:37am - kids - by John W. (man) - United States (Colorado)



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