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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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tokintot07

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tokintot07
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 450
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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tokintot07's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML

#8980623 (203)

I agree, your life sucks (21877) - you deserved it (3346)

On 03/10/2010 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by cmore - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

#8972431 (247)

I agree, your life sucks (21284) - you deserved it (2649)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by watersport (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to tell my mother what I thought about religion. I've been raised catholic. I told her I was converting to Wicca, to which she sort of nodded and walked away. I went into my room to study with my earbuds in, music loud. I walked out to see a cross nailed above my door. FML

#2202679 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (30273) - you deserved it (23725)

On 05/23/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by Sigh (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I flew from New York to San Fransisco with my wife. We were seated apart and were texting each other about our seatmates in Spanish. I told her the ass of the woman next to me was oozing under the armrest and making my leg sweat. The oozer told me that lots of fat asses can read Spanish. 6 hours to SF. FML

#2177396 (334)

I agree, your life sucks (10616) - you deserved it (50630)

On 05/22/2009 at 11:17am - misc - by mecago (man) - United States (California)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was running outside. On the last mile I am along side some fields. While running along the side of the road I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML

#2176338 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (26002) - you deserved it (9140)

On 05/22/2009 at 10:08am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while interviewing for a job I had to read over the physical requirements for the job. Later on she asked me how flexible I was. Trying to keep a straight face, I told her I was more flexible while I was playing sports but could work on it if I need to. She was talking about work hours. FML

#2175107 (53)

I agree, your life sucks (8414) - you deserved it (30522)

On 05/22/2009 at 8:09am - work - by bigblue51 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her bluetooth headset. FML

#2147248 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (15256) - you deserved it (49907)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:16pm - work - by unemployed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

#2147101 (218)

I agree, your life sucks (42158) - you deserved it (16201)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:13pm - love - by ECullen (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was looking over some old notes from high school when I came across a list of things I wanted to accomplish by the time I'm 25. I haven't accomplished a single one. I'm 26. FML

#2144492 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (33201) - you deserved it (10574)

On 05/21/2009 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents bought me a wine glass with "Who needs a man?" painted all over it. Cute, until after dinner my mom looked me in the eyes and asked with complete sincerity, "Kara, are you gay?" My parents tried to get me to come out. I'm straight. FML

#2140497 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (40434) - you deserved it (2094)

On 05/21/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by pa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, we went out to dinner to a family restaurant, and I was wearing a skirt since it's so warm out. My 4 year old scooted under the table to sit next to his brother. When he popped up on the other side, he exclaimed, "Mommy! You forgot to put on your underwears!" People were staring. FML

#2140359 (272)

I agree, your life sucks (12527) - you deserved it (42969)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:45am - kids - by whoopsiedoodle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's Catholic all girls high school to ask her to prom by decorating her car. As soon as I walked on campus the school went into lock down because of a "suspicious male intruder." When I saw my girlfriend, she denied knowing me. I was arrested. FML

#2109937 (226)

I agree, your life sucks (57367) - you deserved it (4384)

On 05/20/2009 at 11:11am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my cat kept sneezing all morning so I took her to the vet. $150 later and the vet says she's fine. I get home and the noise starts up again. My automatic air freshener spray sounds just like my cat sneezing. FML

#2107196 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (11976) - you deserved it (34921)

On 05/20/2009 at 5:07am - animals - by catlover (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, me and my girlfriend were buying Subway. When it came to ring up the order the lady asked us together or separate? My girlfriend looked and said separate. Half-jokingly, I asked if it was some sort of hint? She looked at me and said yes. I got broken up over a 12 inch ham sub. FML

#2104597 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (47575) - you deserved it (2840)

On 05/20/2009 at 1:37am - love - by Richie (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband was leaving on a long business trip to Germany. As he's leaving, my daughter starts crying. 'Dont leave me with her !' she says. 'Take me with you !' FML

#2104254 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (40292) - you deserved it (5981)

On 05/20/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States