Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tkooker

Search for a member

tkooker

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 111
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

tkooker's page activity

Visits<b>BuchiNeko</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 2:25pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 9:49pm<b>a33324332</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 1:32am<b>thisbeamber</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 6:09am<b>neverdrinkSODA</b> - the 09/14/2012 at 8:08pm

tkooker's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of tkooker's badges

tkooker's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my new girlfriend is a screamer. This would normally turn me on, except she sounds like she's being murdered with a rusty fork. FML

#20193609
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34676) - you deserved it (3990)

On 12/06/2012 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Dontwaketheneighbors (man) - United States (California)

Today, excited that I finally got a place of my own, I invited my boyfriend over for a sexy sleep over. He told me his mom doesn't want him sleeping over. He's 21 years old. FML

#20162787
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31830) - you deserved it (4123)

On 11/14/2012 at 2:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31865) - you deserved it (18442)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML

#20066828
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6559) - you deserved it (26226)

On 09/10/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by mrs14 - United States

Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML

#20057702
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6351) - you deserved it (20148)

On 09/04/2012 at 6:02pm - misc - by CantPublish - United States

Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cotton swab shoved up my cock's piss-pipe. FML

#20057281
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24645) - you deserved it (8422)

On 09/04/2012 at 11:09am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that if a guy you've been dating starts acting weird, there's probably a reason why. Like, perhaps, a wife and two kids. FML

#20050674
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28182) - you deserved it (2626)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:02am - love - by yonanon - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

#20040696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18658) - you deserved it (8160)

On 08/25/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was so desperate for any kind of male romantic attention that I googled "prison pen pals", and I'm considering writing to one. FML

#20033437
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10061) - you deserved it (21102)

On 08/21/2012 at 4:39am - love - by desperategurl (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML

#20011112
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15670) - you deserved it (20298)

On 08/09/2012 at 7:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me he still has the key to our mailbox, while being at the other part of the country. Not to worry though, he sent it over. By mail. FML

#20000050
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22724) - you deserved it (1784)

On 08/03/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by Lara (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, and for the last week, I've resorted to driving myself to the nearest corner store to take my daily dump. I'm doing this because I recently moved in with my boyfriend, and I'm afraid he'll be disgusted at how often I clog the toilet. FML

#19822934
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11922) - you deserved it (26346)

On 06/21/2012 at 6:02am - health - by TheDumper (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML

#19484156
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35600) - you deserved it (2282)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by Jason199615 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I put on a pair of sneakers that I'd left outside, and went jogging. After several minutes of pain, I pulled off one of the sneakers, only to find dozens of baby spiders had moved in. FML

#18824245
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33129) - you deserved it (10321)

On 01/16/2012 at 12:10pm - animals - by moorox45 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: