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tjsaysrawr

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tjsaysrawr
  • Town/Country : Fayetteville
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 303
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About tjsaysrawr : I'm awesome XD

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tjsaysrawr's favorite FMLs

Today, trying to be nice, I sat with the lonely kid at lunch. While eating, he started laughing and showed me his hit list. I was at the top. FML

#20524308
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28565) - you deserved it (4731)

On 02/27/2013 at 11:43am - misc - by dangerZone - United States (Georgia)

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

#20518830
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22589) - you deserved it (39984)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by think i'm dating perdix (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35111) - you deserved it (2803)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML

#20508270
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33447) - you deserved it (8574)

On 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by Acolyte of the Bacon God (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

#20503125
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30395) - you deserved it (5029)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27407) - you deserved it (1646)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
172 comments

Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they are made of a fish bi-product. Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there are countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard. FML

#20502144
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30242) - you deserved it (3771)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:48am - animals - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

#20499722
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30257) - you deserved it (4248)

On 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML

#20498998
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30278) - you deserved it (7879)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched The Passion of the Christ with my girlfriend. She kept scoffing at what she called the "historical inaccuracies", and actually tried to convince me that Hitler killed Jesus. When I corrected her, she looked at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane. FML

#20498635
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28977) - you deserved it (4351)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm - love - by and she doesn't even give bjs (man) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

#20494997
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31284) - you deserved it (6288)

On 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm - love - by NewlyDread (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

#20494543
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34032) - you deserved it (3008)

On 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm - misc - by Experience (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years decided to buy a $2500 taxidermied wolf on eBay. This is the same guy who refuses to get engaged because it would "cost too much right now." FML

#20487239
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29429) - you deserved it (4902)

On 01/31/2013 at 2:23am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML

#20484951
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26066) - you deserved it (3147) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)



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