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timmy257

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timmy257

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  • Number of visits : 305
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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timmy257's page activity

Visits<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 1:52pm

timmy257's FML badges

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timmy257's favorite FMLs

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML

#21145062
191 comments

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41529) - you deserved it (4544)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59048) - you deserved it (25702)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, while trying to break up with my girlfriend, I somehow ended up begging her not to break up with me. I'm still not sure how that happened. FML

#20988052
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37557) - you deserved it (19111)

On 12/10/2013 at 6:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Bangladesh

Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. After telling her everything I'm going through, she looked at me and said "You know... every five years or so I get a case completely beyond my ability to help." I guess it's been five years. FML

#20963305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45204) - you deserved it (2951)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:31pm - health - by elle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my brother and I got into an intense argument that ended up with us trading blows and having the cops called on us. Apparently I was "insulting his intelligence" by trying to explain that you don't make buttermilk by putting butter in milk. He's 18. FML

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

#20945549
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42016) - you deserved it (7741)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by UnfortunatelyAmusing (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had an anxiety attack when I learned that my favorite book series is coming to the end. I had to leave the store and sit in my car. FML

#20930715
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36329) - you deserved it (8123)

On 10/23/2013 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I realized how bad my OCD is when I accidentally got a paper cut and I was annoyed by the fact that the cut wasn't in a straight line. FML

#20927328
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41644) - you deserved it (6223)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:34am - health - by Teiu88 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my students to buy a copy of Anne Frank's diary for an assignment. One of them asked me in all seriousness who wrote it. FML

#20925665
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42949) - you deserved it (4494) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/18/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by Huedadaa - France (Picardie)

Today, my mother topped someone's story of their child's problems by saying I'm on drugs. This resulted in people showing up to stage an intervention for me. She made the whole thing up and I've never used drugs, but no one believes me. FML

#20924836
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43373) - you deserved it (2583)

On 10/18/2013 at 2:13am - health - by Jan (man) - United States

Today, I had to take my boyfriend to the emergency room to get stitches from cutting his arm during sex. I sat there while he explained to the doctor how it was the best orgasm ever. FML

#20924645
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45587) - you deserved it (6279)

On 10/17/2013 at 11:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

#20921711
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46181) - you deserved it (4373)

On 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

#20919376
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52320) - you deserved it (3289)

On 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by mustabeendrugs (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML

#20917232
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42128) - you deserved it (3094)

On 10/12/2013 at 2:19am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)



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