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tim_narnimee

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tim_narnimee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 October 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 958
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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tim_narnimee's FML badges

Consolation prize

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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tim_narnimee's favorite FMLs

Today, it's been almost a week since I returned from my vacation to Ireland. Before I rarely drank. Now I'm pretty sure I'm an alcoholic. You might think I'm joking, but I've woken up hungover every day since I landed there. I basically paid to kill my liver and become AA's next poster child. FML

#21245034
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21838) - you deserved it (11842)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17588) - you deserved it (40762)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, I went to get my hair cut. My stylist had the greatest tattoo of a rat on her arm. I spent the whole appointment thinking about how cool the tattoo was, and what an interesting person she must be to choose such a thing. So I complimented her on it and she said, "Oh it's a wolf." FML

#21239690
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36701) - you deserved it (6259)

On 08/17/2014 at 11:19am - misc - by Etrius (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went camping with my husband not too far from our house. We got our tent pitched up, stove ready and roll-out bed out. He then said, "I'm just gonna go for a walk." It had been about an hour before I decided to go find him. He had walked home to play CoD. FML

#21239602
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43175) - you deserved it (4805)

On 08/17/2014 at 6:19am - misc - by AnnoyedWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40870) - you deserved it (13236)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I had to awkwardly grab my pink dildo after my husband's friend asked what it was that my dog was chewing on. FML

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44652) - you deserved it (7365)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML

#21238533
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37360) - you deserved it (6035)

On 08/15/2014 at 10:16pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boss threw out the report I wrote for the board of directors. He said that if it were legal, he'd smash me in the balls with a brick for using Comic Sans. I had to do the whole thing again in another font with my coworkers snickering at me. FML

#21238351
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19839) - you deserved it (48186)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to a café and got some soup. When I was done, a nice waiter came over and offered to take my mostly empty soup bowl. I quickly at the last of it, looked up smiling and said "thanks". The soup dribbled out of my mouth and onto his hand. FML

#21237898
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33891) - you deserved it (9503)

On 08/15/2014 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

Today, I went to a job interview, and a guy ahead of me went to enter the building, only to walk face-first into a glass door. I rushed to help him up, and after we had a good laugh about it, I turned to walk inside, only to walk straight into the door as well. FML

#21236025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40572) - you deserved it (8802)

On 08/12/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by facefuckedguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38214) - you deserved it (8999)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37244) - you deserved it (22807)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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