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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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tigger588

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tigger588
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 384
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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tigger588's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML

#5655008 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (8857) - you deserved it (25630)

On 10/05/2009 at 12:16am - health - by Painful (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was talking to my best friend. After admitting to me that he's gay, I gave him a hug for support and comfort, feeling his erection on my upper thigh. FML

I agree, your life sucks (15955) - you deserved it (3308)

On 10/01/2009 at 2:10am - intimacy - by betchyo (man) - United States (Massachusetts) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I learned that if you're going to tell your mother you are gay, make sure she isn't holding a frying pan filled with hot grease. FML

#5530332 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (46180) - you deserved it (9814)

On 09/28/2009 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML

#5494744 (154)

I agree, your life sucks (5059) - you deserved it (41396)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by civicman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after the most stressful two weeks of my life, I finally found a few minutes to sit down with a relaxing cup of tea. I went to take a sip, sneezed, smashed the mug into my nose, and dumped scalding hot tea all over my face and cleavage. FML

#5481614 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (29392) - you deserved it (3519)

On 09/26/2009 at 6:39am - misc - by pygmalion (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I received an envelope from verizon. I assumed it was my bill. I opened it and saw a visa credit card offer so I quickly snapped it in half to prevent identity theft. Only after playing with the pieces for 10 minutes did I realize that it was my $100 rebate from my new phone. FML

#5463734 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (4414) - you deserved it (38678)

On 09/25/2009 at 8:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I told my girlfriend I have only one testicle. Her reaction? "Eeew, balls are gross!" I'm glad to know I'm only half as gross as other guys. FML

#5463165 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (14516) - you deserved it (2033)

On 09/25/2009 at 7:13am - intimacy - by lone_ranger (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML

#5344643 (255)

I agree, your life sucks (56723) - you deserved it (2967)

On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (343)

I agree, your life sucks (34981) - you deserved it (98543)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I noticed my dishwasher wouldn't turn on. After shelling out $120 call-out fee, I was a little miffed when the technician walked in, pressed the 'unlock' function and walked out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks (5589) - you deserved it (34837)

On 08/17/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by veevee (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up with my girl laying next to me in bed. When she woke up we started to get hot and heavy but all of a sudden our cat hops on the bed. I guess the cat was more important cause my girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by another pussy. FML

#4572543 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (44833) - you deserved it (5881)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at the lake watching a romantic sunset with my boyfriend. He tenderly started touching my thigh, then started shaking my leg to the rhythm while singing the J-E-L-L-O theme song. FML

#4570471 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (38331) - you deserved it (5737)

On 08/16/2009 at 10:32am - intimacy - by juliaspaperbags (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

#4566458 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (41337) - you deserved it (6746)

On 08/16/2009 at 3:05am - health - by irony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I puke and then pass out at the sight of blood. I am a 16 year old girl expecting hundreds of periods to come. FML

#4554817 (393)

I agree, your life sucks (42839) - you deserved it (5145)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:06pm - health - by hellnooo (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I wore the new bathing suit my boyfriend got me for my birthday to a family reunion pool party. Turns out, it was a gag gift that dissolves after 3 minutes in water. FML

#4550817 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (60963) - you deserved it (4726)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)