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Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21194) - you deserved it (5817)
On 01/02/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I had the pleasure of meeting my girlfriend's mother for the very first time. She walked in on me in the bathroom; I'd completely lost focus and fallen asleep while taking a shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9985) - you deserved it (16766)
On 12/24/2010 at 6:49pm - love - by Username - United States (Mississippi)
Today, my boyfriend said that we can "maybe have sleepovers" at his house when he FINALLY moves out. He's 24, and we've been dating for 6 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18131) - you deserved it (5840)
On 12/23/2010 at 12:21am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I looked deep into my wife's eyes and told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. Her reply was "Clean your glasses." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21832) - you deserved it (2920)
On 12/21/2010 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't attend her dog's funeral, and was therefore an insensitive bastard. I couldn't attend because my mum has cancer and I was driving her to a hospital appointment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39799) - you deserved it (2172)
On 12/19/2010 at 7:31pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, after a long time convincing my parents that my boyfriend is really a good guy, not only did he decide to come by the house completely drunk, but he also ended up trying to kiss my mom, thinking it was me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19833) - you deserved it (6805)
On 12/19/2010 at 7:20pm - love - by hugme101 (woman) - Canada
Today, I sat in the cafeteria at work and saw a girl, which is a rare sight at my workplace, from the back with a beautifully long ponytail. After a full hour of building up courage to perhaps say hi to her, she turned around. It was a 50-year-old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10175) - you deserved it (20396)
On 12/19/2010 at 5:28am - love - by lonelyengineer (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there awhile. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for "help". FML
I agree, your life sucks (20482) - you deserved it (3056)
On 12/19/2010 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24704) - you deserved it (3046)
On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27473) - you deserved it (3058)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:11am - love - by anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32934) - you deserved it (7370)
On 12/13/2010 at 3:29pm - love - by phonesage (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my little cousin is going to be staying at our house for a year or so, because of financial problems. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that every single night he creeps up on me while I'm sleeping, and shouts "GO F YOURSELF!" directly into my ear. Only another 11 months to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21183) - you deserved it (2288)
On 10/28/2010 at 12:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I realized that the "pimples" on my back weren't pimples at all. Because I was unable to see how bad they were for the last week, I never caught on to the fact the they were, in fact, ticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27513) - you deserved it (4537)
On 02/14/2010 at 9:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74995) - you deserved it (10601)
On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51036) - you deserved it (11675)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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