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tiffie29's favorite FMLs
by ms_nothing / 08/19/2011 at 12:03am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by kaitylait / 08/18/2011 at 8:59pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Health
by boyfriend123 / 08/18/2011 at 6:02am / United States / Miscellaneous
by gb / 08/18/2011 at 1:18am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, my family decided it would be hilarious to catch the biggest moths they could and let them loose in my room. I'm terrified of moths and they thought it would be 'funny as hell' to watch me freak out. FML
by livgasms / 08/18/2011 at 12:02am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from work tired and horny, and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to go make love. While all she had done all day is lay on the couch and watch television, she said, "I'm too tired, why don't you just go into the bathroom and grab a quick wank." FML
by Frank / 08/17/2011 at 2:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was driving my twin daughters to school, when I accidentally honked my horn. I told them it was an accident. One of my kids said she already knew, because I didn't yell "asshole" afterwards. FML
by Kathryn / 08/13/2011 at 6:31am / Belgium / Kids
by fml / 08/12/2011 at 2:14am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by elvisfreak5446 / 08/10/2011 at 12:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML
by me / 08/08/2011 at 11:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML
by moonstone15 / 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
Today, I was feeling a little naughty, so I put on a sexy outfit, laid down on the hood of my boyfriend's car, and waited for him to find me. When he came into the garage and saw me, he freaked out and bitched at me, because I "could have dented the chassis". FML
by username / 07/31/2011 at 6:19pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by creepedout / 07/31/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Intimacy
Today, as I was taking the bus home, I sat down next to a man wearing an FML shirt. While snickering I said to him "You totally deserved it." I guess he thought that comment deserved a broken nose. FML
by Anonymous / 07/30/2011 at 5:26am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation
Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML
by Nickname / 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
- Today, I truly understood that I was in Germany when, in my workplace, during our lunch break, one… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to…