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tiffanynickole's favorite FMLs
Today, I had some hot phone sex with my long-distance girlfriend. Half-way through, my mom stormed in, and told me I was disgusting and sick for doing it in the same room as my brother. I forgot about the baby monitor. FML
by hornyloser / 05/02/2011 at 2:46pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Scarlett / 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Wendie / 04/18/2011 at 12:10pm / United States (California) / Animals
by rastafarimon / 04/17/2011 at 1:56am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Bailey / 04/05/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids
by JJMan217 / 03/29/2011 at 2:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
Today, I was rudely stopped in the park by a woman screaming at me for being a slut for having a baby so young. She got so worked up that she started swearing. Not only was I just babysitting for a friend, I am unable to get the toddler to stop swearing. FML
by QuicksilverMaximoff / 01/30/2011 at 9:46am / United Kingdom (St. Helens) / Kids
Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML
by Oriianna Raiinbow / 10/23/2010 at 2:07am / United States (California) / Love
Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML
by Doritos / 06/17/2010 at 4:06am / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
by imustbegay / 05/09/2010 at 10:20am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I bought my wedding dress and sat it on the bed while I went to buy matching shoes. When I came home, I saw my soon to be husband on the bed sitting next to my wedding dress. Turns out he spilt Coca-Cola on the dress and was trying to get it out with carpet cleanser. FML
by Stephanie / 03/04/2010 at 7:01pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I gave a technical presentation to a group of male colleagues. I was surprised by how attentive they were until I went to the washroom and realized that they could see every detail of my nipples through my new shirt. FML
by bun593 / 02/26/2010 at 8:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML
by cold-n-stinky / 01/12/2010 at 1:30am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, my university fridge is so small that the cucumber I bought doesn’t fit either lengthwise or… Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to… Today, I’m on vacation in Japan. Hungry, I went to a restaurant. Looking at photos of the food, I…