Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 652
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

thongs4lyfe's page activity

Visits<b>3051628</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 2:24pm<b>Fax287</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 3:38pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 11:01pm<b>anonwilliam</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 8:21pm<b>ThatLobster</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 4:31pm<b>colinabi</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:22pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 11:04am<b>erinblackk</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 11:48am<b>bigmac1414</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 11:24pm<b>vampirapaige</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 7:06am<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 3:53pm<b>djcaper</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 12:47am<b>MindstormsKid</b> - the 03/08/2010 at 9:40pm<b>Lv2drum930</b> - the 03/07/2010 at 8:24am<b>perdix</b> - the 02/07/2010 at 4:53pm

thongs4lyfe's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

thongs4lyfe's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. She pulls out a freezer bag full of condoms and says "I have some cooler ones upstairs, if you want his penis to glow in the dark." FML


I agree, your life sucks (27912) - you deserved it (4376)

On 03/06/2010 at 7:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at work a really hot guy came up to me and asked "what are your hours?" Excited, I told him I get off at 4 but might be able to get out sooner. He started laughing and then said "I meant your store hours". He turned around and walked away, shaking his head and laughing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14680) - you deserved it (31562)

On 02/15/2010 at 9:29am - work - by Dumbdumb (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up in the hospital. I had apparently overworked my heart so much that I fainted. What caused it? I was playing a racing game on my Wii and freaked out when I won first place. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15055) - you deserved it (37112)

On 02/01/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by overexcited (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's sorority formal, we were both drunk. We went into the bathroom, she started to give me head. After about 30 seconds the song changes and she jumps up and goes out to dance, leaving me there. Door open. Penis out. It was the song she requested. FML


I agree, your life sucks (74367) - you deserved it (19554)

On 05/03/2009 at 1:10pm - intimacy - by Lootz (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (70101) - you deserved it (4158)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: