thestoryofmylyf

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Offline (the 07/23/2016 at 12:08am)

thestoryofmylyf

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1925
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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thestoryofmylyf's page activity

Visits<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 7:33pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 10:23am<b>pokerface71</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 10:03am<b>Shrouds</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 5:37pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 7:12pm

Fucked!<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 4:21pm

thestoryofmylyf's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of thestoryofmylyf's badges

thestoryofmylyf's favorite FMLs

Today, a bee flew into my classroom and landed on my cheek. Not only am I allergic to these things, I was hit in the face with a textbook to "make sure it's dead." FML

by shabowbow / 03/27/2014 at 2:14pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was walking and saw a quarter. I bent down to pick it up. Barely a foot ahead there was another, so I crawled over to get it. This continued for about six feet when I realize a kid was laying them out in a trail. I had collected 7 fake quarters and the kid had it on video. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2014 at 11:46pm / United States (Indiana) / Money

Today, we had a surprise party for my boss. Someone turned out all the lights. I was so scared of the dark, the first thing my boss saw when he walked in was all my co-workers watching me scream, "TURN IT ON!" FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2014 at 11:47am / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2014 at 8:16pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML

by fuckmeitsgettingworse / 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend proposed: he told me the feeling he gets from being in love with me is the best feeling in the world, even better than the feeling he gets when he poops. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2014 at 10:43am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boyfriend of 6 years told me that since I've proven my loyalty and faithfully stuck by his side, he has no reason to ever consider marrying me, because "It's not like you're going anywhere, honey." He seems not to understand why I am upset by this. FML

by heartbrokenhaley / 01/23/2014 at 3:57pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my husband jokingly told my daughter when she passes gas in public she needs to blame it on the fattest and ugliest person there. We went shopping after and she let a HUGE fart out. She gasped, "Mommy!" FML

by FattestUgliestPerson / 01/18/2014 at 4:45am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Kids

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately, I ducked into the girl's bathroom. After few minutes, he stuck his head in with his eyes closed and asked if I was done yet. FML

by stalked / 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, when I am asked to do something and I don't do it immediately, my mother threatens to "twerk" in front of my friends. FML

by FMLPLZ / 01/02/2014 at 9:52pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML

by yulis / 11/30/2013 at 2:21pm / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, I had to bail my husband out of jail. It turns out that in the Black Friday rush, he beat a guy up just so he could get his hands on the last of a heavily-discounted item. The item in question: a toaster. FML

by fleetingmemories / 11/29/2013 at 6:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous