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thepirate19

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thepirate19

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  • Number of visits : 575
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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thepirate19's page activity

Visits<b>Rozay333</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:02am<b>cabrillo56</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 9:53am<b>holysassafras</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 11:04pm<b>landonabele</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 10:21pm<b>Tari</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 1:06am<b>Bobissmall</b> - the 08/17/2011 at 11:44pm<b>boopityboppity</b> - the 09/17/2010 at 3:45pm

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

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thepirate19's favorite FMLs

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17996) - you deserved it (76371)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I dined and dashed. Upon reaching my car, I realized I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML

#18217676
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8550) - you deserved it (107961)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML

#18203488
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42252) - you deserved it (5056)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

#18202922
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29743) - you deserved it (22165)

On 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

#18200253
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55951) - you deserved it (8313)

On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

#18190231
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42973) - you deserved it (7848)

On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30494) - you deserved it (2517)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML

#18184831
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21874) - you deserved it (5235)

On 11/07/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Olorin (man) - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

#18128656
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46968) - you deserved it (5371)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26962) - you deserved it (32339)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

#18051286
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41320) - you deserved it (19100)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

#18035123
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39885) - you deserved it (10555)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by skinny dipper - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to the store to pick up some tampons. After waiting in line for about 10 minutes, the male cashier looked at me when I was leaving and said, "Have a nice... week!" FML

#18023767
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30546) - you deserved it (4570)

On 10/19/2011 at 3:36pm - misc - by sarah (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

#18015213
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50705) - you deserved it (7984)

On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my brother put pepper spray on my toilet paper. FML

#17987492
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42120) - you deserved it (3469)

On 10/15/2011 at 3:18am - misc - by Ca13b - United States (Oregon)



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