theninja1800

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theninja1800

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4290
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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theninja1800's page activity

Visits<b>lieutenantdan97</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 8:19pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:23am<b>bookgirl_7</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 1:30am<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 12:08pm<b>JakeQuake</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:33am<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 11:58pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 3:08am<b>ShadowFlame275</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 6:40am<b>The_night_walker</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 6:03am<b>gghhffh</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 2:02am<b>IndieParadise</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 1:16am<b>MikaykayUnicorn</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 12:43am<b>little_siren</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 10:35pm<b>eyunayev</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 10:28pm<b>WakkaWakka10</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 8:48pm<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 3:08pm<b>nichollelovins</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 1:37pm<b>Brando23</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 11:53pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:23pm

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theninja1800's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband was chased out of a bar after he was seen slipping something into a woman's drink. I was the woman, the 'something' was aspirin, and that's the last time we ever try to role-play. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

by suckstosuck / 07/23/2013 at 12:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from the police. Apparently my son tried robbing a teenage couple, but wound up getting his ass beat by both of them. I don't know what's worse, that my 32-year-old son is a criminal, or that he got it handed to him by 15-year-olds. FML

by Parentalfailure / 07/22/2013 at 5:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, the great deal on my new apartment has turned into a nightmare. I keep hearing extremely weird sounds almost every night, and when I tried taking pics of the place today, my camera's face recognition feature kept activating, but only in my bedroom. I'm scared shitless. FML

by notenoughunderwearintheworld / 07/21/2013 at 4:54pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Transportation

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2013 at 11:45am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, a kid was ranting that "people these days are so rude" and that "things were much better in the '50s." Annoyed, I asked the delusional twat what was so great about the racial segregation, rampant sexism, homophobia, and all the rest back then. He responded by punching me. FML

by "people these days" / 07/19/2013 at 4:36pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I had to break up a fist fight between two female residents. I work in a retirement home. FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2013 at 9:03pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2013 at 2:16pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

by coldstar / 07/18/2013 at 5:06am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. His reason was that my laugh is really annoying and makes him want to "stick a baby in a blender". FML

by ... cheers / 07/16/2013 at 4:32pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Love

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

by Aliiiice / 07/16/2013 at 9:18am / France (Haute-Normandie) / Health

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

by ouch / 07/12/2013 at 3:22am / United States / Miscellaneous