theninja1800

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theninja1800

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6190
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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theninja1800's page activity

Visits<b>lieutenantdan97</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 8:19pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:23am<b>bookgirl_7</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 1:30am<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 12:08pm<b>JakeQuake</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:33am<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 11:58pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 3:08am<b>ShadowFlame275</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 6:40am<b>The_night_walker</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 6:03am<b>gghhffh</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 2:02am<b>IndieParadise</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 1:16am<b>MikaykayUnicorn</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 12:43am<b>little_siren</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 10:35pm<b>eyunayev</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 10:28pm<b>WakkaWakka10</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 8:48pm<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 3:08pm<b>nichollelovins</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 1:37pm<b>Brando23</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 11:53pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:23pm

theninja1800's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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theninja1800's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

by girly / 04/12/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I repeatedly screamed so loudly and with such emotion at a video game, that my neighbours thought I was in trouble and called the police. FML

by thatscreamerguy / 04/03/2012 at 7:11am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home from work to find a burglar in my house. He then said that he was just leaving, and went back out of the broken window. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML

by Jeff make / 04/01/2012 at 10:03am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML

by azmom / 03/27/2012 at 1:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shaving naked in my cold bathroom before showering. My wife walked up behind me, yelled "Shrinkage!" and flicked the head of my penis as hard as she could. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2012 at 12:16am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2012 at 2:23am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to shave my balls. When I was finished, I vacuumed up the mess on the carpet, and then the fragments of hair still on my balls. Very bad idea. FML

by BadIdea / 03/01/2012 at 4:23pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML

by soawkward / 01/26/2012 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, out of habit, I said "See you later" to a creepy old male customer who stared at my chest the whole time I was serving him. His response was to wink and say, "Oh, you will." FML

by terrified / 01/18/2012 at 2:02pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML

by cazorp / 01/05/2012 at 6:43am / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML

by vanessa560 / 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, it's the last day of finals week. Unfortunately the only test I've passed this week is the pregnancy test I took during my lunch break in a Subway bathroom. FML

by LogicalMolly / 12/13/2011 at 12:16am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I summoned up the courage to tell my crush how I've felt about her for the past two years. I really poured out my heart and soul, and she nodded and smiled throughout. Once I'd finished, she told me that she believes "sex is unnatural", and that she could never date a guy who wanted it. FML

by wow / 12/11/2011 at 8:37pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love