thelindseyyy

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thelindseyyy

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2922
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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thelindseyyy's page activity

Visits<b>turtles4life</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 10:35pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 9:13am<b>EmilyElisse</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 9:13am<b>Altair18</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 12:30pm<b>Senseless_487</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 3:23am<b>MissModelGirl</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 1:28am<b>tashag93</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 12:12am

thelindseyyy's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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thelindseyyy's favorite FMLs

Today, I pulled into the gas station to fill up only to realize I had forgot my wallet. By the time I went home, got it, and came back, the price had gone up eleven cents. FML

by WhoopteeDooDoo / 10/12/2011 at 6:47pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML

by danii / 10/04/2011 at 11:28pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML

by Mike Polk / 10/03/2011 at 8:37am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to school without makeup. No one recognized me. FML

by Nicole / 09/19/2011 at 4:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

by unicorn / 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

by southernluxe / 09/04/2011 at 5:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

by southernluxe / 09/04/2011 at 5:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I reached the point in my life where Target is the "expensive" store. FML

by anti88 / 08/31/2011 at 9:55pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm / United States / Animals

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

by vishuzzbabe77 / 08/22/2011 at 2:04am / United States / Animals

Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML

by froggylicious / 08/16/2011 at 2:18pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

by creepedoutlady / 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML

by power corrupts... / 08/07/2011 at 4:29pm / Czech Republic (Plzensky kraj) / Work