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thelindseyyy

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thelindseyyy

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  • Number of visits : 1081
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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thelindseyyy's page activity

Visits<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 9:13am<b>EmilyElisse</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 9:13am<b>Altair18</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 12:30pm<b>Senseless_487</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 3:23am<b>MissModelGirl</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 1:28am<b>tashag93</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 12:12am

thelindseyyy's FML badges

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thelindseyyy's favorite FMLs

Today, I still can't decide whether masturbating while looking at myself makes me narcissistic or just plain pathetic. FML

#19890601
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8445) - you deserved it (32112)

On 07/04/2012 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, an exchange student was telling us how he once used a black light to detect semen stains on his "abstinent" ex-girlfriend's face. I called him out on the obvious lie, saying it's an old urban legend. He wigged out, screamed that I'm a "bastarding shite-wank" and ran out of class. FML

#19573864
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18675) - you deserved it (4692)

On 05/04/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by Garry (man) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that black people aren't all lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31398) - you deserved it (2656)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13340) - you deserved it (54581) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a basketball game. A very pretty woman sat next to him. During the third quarter, the kiss cam came on. But it didn't show him and me, it showed him and the other girl. And they kissed. FML

#19426684
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44480) - you deserved it (3088)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:19pm - love - by jordyn173 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went to McDonalds and ordered a happy meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML

#19401139
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39321) - you deserved it (4539)

On 04/03/2012 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML

#19388939
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22153) - you deserved it (9318)

On 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States

Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML

#19339659
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7699) - you deserved it (25122)

On 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Avery - United States (California)

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

#19246597
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24341) - you deserved it (2206)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

#19101207
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35266) - you deserved it (5467)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

#19064063
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32132) - you deserved it (6171)

On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

#19026244
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23639) - you deserved it (2979)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

#18991669
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31462) - you deserved it (2755) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/04/2012 at 11:39am - misc - by DarkDolly - France

Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML

#18681564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26441) - you deserved it (7821)

On 01/02/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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