thejenster29

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Offline (the 10/09/2015 at 5:20am)

thejenster29

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 521
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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thejenster29's page activity

Visits<b>bjf21</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:08pm<b>VitalDistance</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 9:37pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:06am<b>JMichael</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:32pm<b>Alup132</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:55am<b>krupa1017</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 11:46am<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 5:19pm<b>Tbearshy</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 7:35am

thejenster29's FML badges

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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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thejenster29's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

by Amithatevil / 08/29/2014 at 8:35am / Japan (Kanagawa) / Kids

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2014 at 12:34am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

by whotouchedyou1 / 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I became the town racist for saying "black" instead of "African-American". I'm black. FML

by guest / 06/18/2014 at 9:14pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2014 at 5:27am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I got called "un-American" when I said I didn't care about Kim and Kayne's wedding. FML

by Yeppets / 05/28/2014 at 12:13am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

by gvmfvr / 05/08/2014 at 4:48pm / Animals

Today, it's been a week since I found an egg in the street that had seemingly fallen out of a nest. I'd bought a cage and an expensive incubator lamp to save it. It's thus been a week that I've been trying to save a mouldy old potato. FML

by mac cayne / 05/01/2014 at 11:13pm / France (Alsace) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my son to go to the grocery store across the street and pick up some lettuce. He sighed and said, "Why don't you just order it on Amazon?" FML

by nh-Amazon / 04/27/2014 at 7:01pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my neighbor asked to come over and use my laptop. She showed up drunk, grabbed my boobs, and asked if I'd ever had a lesbian experience. We both have husbands and kids; the kids were in the room. FML

by freakedout / 04/10/2014 at 10:32pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, my obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I did with my pencil. FML

by Motha / 04/09/2014 at 1:17am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, after paying at the gas station, the cashier stuck out her hand, which was clenched into a fist. I thought she wanted a fist-bump, so I gave her one. She just stared back at me. Turns out she was just trying to give me my change. FML

by SarahNB / 03/01/2014 at 4:09pm / United States (Utah) / Money

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm / United States / Intimacy