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thegrealtdalton

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thegrealtdalton

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  • Number of visits : 308
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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thegrealtdalton's page activity

Visits<b>trolled11</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:46pm

thegrealtdalton's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of thegrealtdalton's badges

thegrealtdalton's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were lying in her bed. We fooled around and were about to have sex as she suddenly began to cry without any reason. She cried for 30 minutes until I finally managed to calm her down. She said there was no reason for her crying. Then she fell asleep. FML

#13830899
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31065) - you deserved it (4501)

On 11/13/2010 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27124) - you deserved it (3018)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

#13373695
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29778) - you deserved it (8938)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, while at the dog park, I suddenly had to use the bathroom really badly. Since there weren't any facilities nearby, I decided to go behind a tree and relieve myself there. While doing this, two other owners, one that's in my math class, noticed me, regardless of me hiding. She definitely saw everything. School will be fun tomorrow. FML

#9001360
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8048) - you deserved it (21984)

On 03/11/2010 at 5:44pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML

#8726872
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13549) - you deserved it (16837)

On 02/28/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Joel_28 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML

#7538814
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24366) - you deserved it (6573)

On 01/24/2010 at 3:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I met my boyfriend's notoriously difficult mother. I had been looking forward to meeting her and making a good impression. Unfortunately, I could not greet her as her son's penis was still in my mouth. FML

#7318001
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26575) - you deserved it (13557)

On 01/13/2010 at 11:42am - intimacy - by pleasedtomeetyou (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

#6691654
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24866) - you deserved it (4520)

On 12/10/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

#6691654
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24866) - you deserved it (4520)

On 12/10/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

#6676147
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42398) - you deserved it (2613)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by PoorGramps - United States (Texas)

Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML

#6534520
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24084) - you deserved it (5410)

On 11/30/2009 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was taking a final test online that would account for 65% of my final grade. I had worked extremely hard in that class. I had one submission for the test. My roommate thought it would be funny to click the "Submit All" Button while i was getting a glass of water. I got a 13%. FML

#6230724
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38596) - you deserved it (2978)

On 11/09/2009 at 5:13pm - work - by Failure (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was DJing for a church event where I was stationed in the middle and everyone was sitting behind me. I walked over to get something to drink and eat and come back with glaring looks. My screensaver had came on with pictures of my naked girlfriend. FML

#6108468
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7251) - you deserved it (45820)

On 11/01/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by terry (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

#5974378
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33034) - you deserved it (8724)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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