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thegrealtdalton

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thegrealtdalton
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 189
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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thegrealtdalton's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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thegrealtdalton's favorite FMLs

Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML

#20067114
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20100) - you deserved it (2042)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while trying to change my visiting cousin's opinion about our state being "redneck and white trash", we stumbled upon a proposal/celebration in a Walmart. So much for changing her opinion. FML

#20066095
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14214) - you deserved it (3052)

On 09/10/2012 at 8:48am - misc - by liquidknight - United States

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

#20007867
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15856) - you deserved it (10095)

On 08/07/2012 at 3:17pm - work - by Employee (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was at a barbecue with my extended family. I was chatting to my grandma, when my idiotic brother decided to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing sounded so much like a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamed and practically shat my pants. FML

#19993096
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8274) - you deserved it (24663)

On 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by NaKreen (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML

#19913255
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21384) - you deserved it (3000)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35070) - you deserved it (3815)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I pulled a neck muscle while head-banging. I wasn't at a concert, and I'm not in a heavy metal band, but I do pretend that I am while I'm in the shower. FML

#19744443
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8062) - you deserved it (17631)

On 06/06/2012 at 2:21pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my visibly drunk uncle stood up and denounced the minister for "preaching yer god shite where it weren't never be welcome". FML

#19276871
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (1977)

On 03/14/2012 at 10:38am - love - by mel_bear_ (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

#18542050
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44741) - you deserved it (1985)

On 12/18/2011 at 2:44am - work - by Sedici - United States

Today, after being yelled at by our boss because the office computer server has yet another virus, my co-worker and I did a bit of investigating. Apparently, the viruses aren't coming from client emails as we previously assumed. It seems that the problem is really our boss's porn addiction. FML

#18452728
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28885) - you deserved it (1970)

On 12/07/2011 at 1:43pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32914) - you deserved it (5849)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML

#18206362
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27055) - you deserved it (3347)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)

Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML

#18206362
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27055) - you deserved it (3347)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)

Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML

#18206362
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27055) - you deserved it (3347)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)



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