thegoodlifeNOT

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thegoodlifeNOT

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13988
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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thegoodlifeNOT's page activity

Visits<b>Sean_1994</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 8:36pm<b>Robert3Lee</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 1:24am<b>NikhilBajaj</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 1:17pm<b>saoaot585</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 9:53pm<b>JCBS94</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 1:26pm<b>albert1018</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 6:03am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:02pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:55am<b>LoosechangeXxXx</b> - the 12/23/2009 at 9:05pm<b>ha</b> - the 11/18/2009 at 7:27pm<b>Matty_No9</b> - the 09/20/2009 at 5:55pm<b>ViCT0RiA</b> - the 09/11/2009 at 7:06pm<b>flamingonion</b> - the 09/11/2009 at 3:28am<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 09/09/2009 at 7:30pm<b>DrakeDarkwind</b> - the 09/02/2009 at 6:27pm<b>utopian</b> - the 08/13/2009 at 5:56pm<b>HummingBirdsFly</b> - the 08/13/2009 at 9:01am<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 11:52pm

thegoodlifeNOT's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

thegoodlifeNOT's favorite FMLs

Today, I drunkenly made out with my 65 year-old married female boss. I'm a 21 year-old male intern. I have a feeling work will be awkward tomorrow. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2009 at 6:16pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I woke up in my friend's living room after our sleepover. I heard her hot older brother and his friends in the kitchen. Feeling confident, I exposed my midriff a little bit just to give them a peek. They groaned and threw a blanket over me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2009 at 7:49am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing songs at a funeral in my church. As the organ wasn't in tune I had to use an electronic piano instead. All was going well until in the end of a speech, I accidentally hit the 'demo' button. None of the grieving relatives were impressed by my drum beats and turntable scratches. FML

by Jacky-Boy / 08/06/2009 at 8:22pm / United Kingdom (Liverpool) / Work

Today, I picked up my 17 years old daughter after a late night movie in down town and got pulled over by a cop. He questioned us for a solicitation. I told the cop that she was my daughter but he said "so you are the daddy" and laughed. Good to know that my daughter looks like a ho and I a perv. FML

by enderw / 06/16/2009 at 1:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML

by psychortiz / 06/03/2009 at 1:40pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

by fallsdownplenty45 / 06/02/2009 at 7:08am / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Kids

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2009 at 4:15pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up fully clothed, trying to remember the night's events. I walk to the den to awkwardly ask my dad for a ride to my car and he points to the computer. A pic of me passed out on the bathroom floor is now our new wallpaper. My skirt was around my knees. He sent it to everyone we know. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting at my college campus, there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I had to go take swimming lessons because my mom has a fear I'll drown and I'm totally afraid of swimming anyway and never get anywhere near water. My instructor? A high school classmate of mine. My fellow swimming classmates? 5 and 6 year old kids. FML

by Cantswim / 05/20/2009 at 11:45am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my girlfriend's Catholic all girls high school to ask her to prom by decorating her car. As soon as I walked on campus the school went into lock down because of a "suspicious male intruder." When I saw my girlfriend, she denied knowing me. I was arrested. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 11:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband was leaving on a long business trip to Germany. As he's leaving, my daughter starts crying. 'Dont leave me with her !' she says. 'Take me with you !' FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 1:18am / United States / Kids

Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML

by Deconstructed / 05/19/2009 at 4:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, after a long night of partying, I was hanging out with this girl I really like. I was feeling really hungover, so we were just sitting at the park. She confessed to me that she's liked me since the day she met me. Out of excitement and hungoverness, I threw up on her shoes. FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2009 at 1:16am / Canada / Love

Today, we were visiting my great-grandma, who has Alzheimer’s. We spent most of the day with her and she didn't know who we all were. Time came for us to leave so when I gave her a hug good-bye, she whispered into my ear, "You're my type." FML

by KarlwithaK / 05/18/2009 at 11:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Love