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thebigslim

Offline (the 11/25/2014 at 5:01am) | Search for a member

thebigslim

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 July 1979 (35 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13492
  • Number of comments : 98
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About thebigslim : Smartass by nature..... and is it just me, or is it next to impossible to get your own FML published on here?

thebigslim's page activity

Visits<b>kionna_d</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 11:09pm<b>BuggChance14</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:03pm<b>Vahex</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 1:30pm<b>paramor3</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 7:09pm<b>cirelesten</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 7:58am<b>JuzReading</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:02am<b>shine999</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 12:59am<b>Kaboom3971</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 12:24am<b>jvfelicio</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 11:28pm<b>bahamit</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Peeves</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 5:08pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 8:00pm<b>laxbro518</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:25am<b>Jthewat</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 9:26pm<b>teentee401</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:29am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 5:56pm<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 12:41am<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 6:30am

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thebigslim's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

#21304373
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25977) - you deserved it (2363)

On 11/23/2014 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

#21299443
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29266) - you deserved it (7958)

On 11/15/2014 at 8:25am - misc - by That_Indian_Guy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my father picked me up from the police academy I'm attending, and got caught speeding. The officer was my drill instructor, and I had to do push-ups on the side of the highway. FML

#21297310
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34243) - you deserved it (4383)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:16pm - misc - by Xx_DEXIJOKER_xX - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

#21296102
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34592) - you deserved it (4898)

On 11/10/2014 at 9:28am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML

#21294686
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16343) - you deserved it (29950)

On 11/08/2014 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML

#21294499
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30339) - you deserved it (4083)

On 11/08/2014 at 2:36am - love - by sickyandiknowit - United States (Oregon)

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37608) - you deserved it (4974)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39704) - you deserved it (3575)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, I was watching adult videos in my apartment. I'm deaf, so I didn't realize my volume was at full blast until I put my hand over the speaker. FML

#21206881
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55701) - you deserved it (10973)

On 07/12/2014 at 10:00am - intimacy - by weeping_angel_ - United States (New York)

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

#21151390
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45561) - you deserved it (8862)

On 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm - intimacy - by whoops (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22794) - you deserved it (53442)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

#21130490
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41266) - you deserved it (10500)

On 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm - health - by Numbass123 (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

#21125262
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42136) - you deserved it (8566)

On 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm - misc - by gassymomma (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41590) - you deserved it (6663)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML

#21104664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37345) - you deserved it (4377)

On 04/04/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by King_of_hearts (man) - United States (Indiana)



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