the_zero_article

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Offline (the 11/01/2015 at 2:30pm)

the_zero_article

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1280
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About the_zero_article : here, queer, ready to nap

fuckboys beware

the_zero_article's page activity

Visits<b>DMo42</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 1:28am<b>CamBamShamDaMan</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 11:49am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 11:03am<b>SSJ4Asterisk</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 7:31am<b>dno79</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:25am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 11:54am<b>ItsaBucsLife</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 12:16pm<b>shelby_franklin</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 12:21am<b>lmbachman</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 5:25pm<b>sstahpp</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 6:06pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 1:12pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 12:11am<b>cjgirl</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 10:35pm<b>nzhx</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 2:21pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 2:15pm<b>swag420xoxo</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 1:51pm<b>happyinlove1999</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 1:41pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 1:18pm

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 5:54pm<b>taterrtots</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:38pm<b>JayGatsby</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 5:03am

the_zero_article's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of the_zero_article's badges

the_zero_article's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like cuddling in bed because he hates rebreathing his own carbon dioxide. FML

by Carowl / 08/04/2015 at 10:33pm / Love

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

by unashamed / 06/05/2014 at 4:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, my university considered it an "embarrassment" that I was going to be the first and only person to graduate from my engineering course, so they gave free passes to two guys who hadn't finished their thesis yet. They were congratulated in the newspaper; I wasn't. FML

Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML

by chevygirl51 / 05/28/2014 at 5:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

by needanotherbed / 05/28/2014 at 10:21am / United Kingdom (Suffolk) / Love

Today, I learned that my daughter was looking for love in all the wrong places, specifically the county jail. FML

by _Ducks_ / 05/28/2014 at 12:08am / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 7:37am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Kids

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

by Q / 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom invited me over yet again so I could practice my culinary degree by making an exquisite, gourmet meal for her dog; a three year old Pomeranian who pees in my shoes. FML

by that_culinary_degree_though / 05/12/2014 at 10:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, my brain-dead brother-in-law decided to play five finger fillet while at my place. Predictably, he ended up slicing a finger wide open. My mother-in-law now wants my blood, because she thinks I dared him to do it, and that clearly her perfect little angel couldn't be such a moron. FML

by fmlgirl / 05/09/2014 at 2:44pm / Netherlands (Zeeland) / Miscellaneous

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

by WTTFFFF / 05/09/2014 at 1:24pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

by BaggedDown / 05/07/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous