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thatironpanda

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thatironpanda

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  • Number of visits : 926
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>Mr_Quinten</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 10:25pm<b>chey4212</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 4:52pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 10:18am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 9:40am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 7:49am<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 6:34am<b>Matrix159</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 1:54am

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thatironpanda's favorite FMLs

Today, I found my electric globe. It asks you where a state, country or city is and you would have to find it and click on it with the pen. I also found out that my parents would sneak into my room at night, take it and play 'strip-globe'. FML

#14708119
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25807) - you deserved it (2769)

On 01/25/2011 at 9:10am - intimacy - by Charlotte -

Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML

#14693760
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72743) - you deserved it (4109)

On 01/24/2011 at 12:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Egypt

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18262) - you deserved it (44277) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my 2 year-old son decided to pee on the dog for the second day in a row. I'm afraid this will turn into a routine thing. FML

#14490872
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27390) - you deserved it (4877)

On 01/06/2011 at 10:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I had the pleasure of meeting my girlfriend's mother for the very first time. She walked in on me in the bathroom; I'd completely lost focus and fallen asleep while taking a shit. FML

#14326550
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14508) - you deserved it (25356)

On 12/24/2010 at 6:49pm - love - by Username - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32669) - you deserved it (3709)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I picked up my friend's new kitten so enthusiastically I scared it and it shat all over me. I literally scared the shit out of it. FML

#14157064
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13704) - you deserved it (27058)

On 12/10/2010 at 7:12pm - misc - by elliekilroy (woman) - United Kingdom (Monmouthshire)

Today, it was my first day back to work since having my first baby. To show I had caught up on everything, I had to give a presentation at the end of the day to the heads of my department. It went really well until the end, when one of them pointed out that breast-milk had been leaking through my clothes the entire time. FML

#13874494
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35423) - you deserved it (3052)

On 11/17/2010 at 7:09am - work - by mommy (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML

#13777689
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41288) - you deserved it (7191)

On 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML

#13426894
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6302) - you deserved it (61465)

On 10/12/2010 at 10:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after bringing my dog back inside, he started whining. I thought it was because he wanted his toys, but he was really trying to say, "Help me," as a torpedo of diarrhea exploded out of him, leaving a trail down the hallway. FML

#13342166
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26207) - you deserved it (4501)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:01pm - animals - by ukfan - United States

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38395) - you deserved it (9668)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, after a costly fix for my brakes that failed a while back as I was going down a hill, I found a $130 bill in the mail attached to a speed camera photo of me shitting myself. FML

#12657021
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27765) - you deserved it (3711)

On 08/21/2010 at 1:25am - money - by car (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I witnessed a series of nude old people cycling in the city. I was eating. FML

#12536404
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35917) - you deserved it (5047)

On 08/15/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by anonymous - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I was reaching for something in the back of the refrigerator. The bottle of hot sauce that was in front of it fell and broke. Not only did the glass cut my feet up, but the hot sauce got in the fresh wounds. FML

#12071239
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37195) - you deserved it (4328)

On 07/23/2010 at 8:06pm - health - by fiery (woman) - United States (Florida)



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