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tf5f89's FML badges
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
tf5f89's favorite FMLs
by cricketsins / 11/07/2013 at 10:33pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML
by thanks gramps / 04/19/2013 at 3:27am / Canada (Yukon Territory) / Miscellaneous
Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML
by Anonymous / 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML
by dadsadipshit / 02/15/2013 at 6:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by I'maboutobarf / 01/31/2013 at 5:28am / Australia / Health
Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML
by idislikeblanks / 01/30/2013 at 2:03am / United States (California) / Kids
by maddiecat / 01/08/2013 at 12:34am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML
by oh gee, you don't say / 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Animals
by Anonymous / 07/19/2012 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was using a public toilet when someone entered the stall next to mine. Instead of using the facilities, the person in there reached under the stall to steal my bag. Fortunately, I was holding the strap so they couldn't take it. Unfortunately, they decided to take my right shoe instead. FML
by fordneagles / 06/11/2012 at 1:56am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
by Eragons_Mommy92 / 05/04/2012 at 10:38am / United States / Money
by Jenn P / 04/21/2012 at 11:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by Not_High / 03/23/2012 at 2:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was discussing the possibility of other life in the universe with my friend. She said the universe isn't big enough for it to be possible, and that we would know about it already, because "there are only 8 planets in the universe." FML
by daninalani / 03/11/2012 at 6:37pm / United States (California) / Transportation
- Today, after spending months comparing the previous weather forecasts to work out the exact date,… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and… Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without…