This member hasn't filled in the description.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78482) - you deserved it (18452)
On 08/06/2009 at 7:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my brother deleted all traces of the novel I've been working on for three years from my laptop. The reason? When I was born I "stole all of Mum and Dad's attention." He's 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54888) - you deserved it (4658)
On 08/05/2009 at 4:30pm - misc - by frustrated - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I found out that I was held back in preschool because of some developmental issues. My parents didn't think it was important enough to mention it to me. Why hadn't I figured it out? They also lied to me about how old I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59511) - you deserved it (2973)
On 08/03/2009 at 2:31am - misc - by dumb (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54725) - you deserved it (11471)
On 08/02/2009 at 12:21am - love - by thefailure (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was wearing a skirt, and running towards a closing elevator, making it just in time. As soon as I ran in, my pad fell out of my underwear and onto the floor. There were 6 other people in the elevator. I picked it up before I realized I had nowhere to put it, so I held it. For 18 floors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51543) - you deserved it (7138)
On 08/01/2009 at 4:15am - misc - by Alice (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was running on a soccer field and accidentally dropped my gum from my mouth. No one had noticed so I picked it up and started chewing again. It was a different flavor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5889) - you deserved it (59323)
On 07/30/2009 at 1:56am - misc - by FGum (man) - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew
Today, I went to buy lunch at a grocery store. The total was 3 pounds, and my card got rejected for insufficient funds. I fished about for change, and found I only had 2 pounds. A homeless man behind me in the queue then offered to give me the remaining pound. A homeless man paid my lunch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34629) - you deserved it (10965)
On 07/29/2009 at 10:24am - money - by faentalivetmitt (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I saw this cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty and asked for her number. She replied "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6048) - you deserved it (83858)
On 07/28/2009 at 6:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55147) - you deserved it (2325)
On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire 2 acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44247) - you deserved it (2742)
On 07/27/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by overthehorizon (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (91592) - you deserved it (27417)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52000) - you deserved it (16298)
On 07/25/2009 at 1:14pm - money - by Pottymouth (man) - United States
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he suddenly stopped and walked to the kitchen. He decided to bake chocolate chip cookies in the midst of our intimacy. However, he told me we could still continue while the oven preheated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41262) - you deserved it (5253)
On 07/24/2009 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by jcooh0lla (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41259) - you deserved it (3196)
On 07/23/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Gg (man) - United Kingdom (Bradford)
Today, I decided to take a nap while babysitting my neighbors kids for the day. I was woken up by this obnoxious sound, only to find the youngest kid holding scissors in one hand, a pony tail of hair in his shorts jumping around like a horse, oh, and a bald spot on the back of my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15873) - you deserved it (47861)
On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - animals - by armybrat - United States (Virginia)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
