Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tellyc

Search for a member

tellyc
  • Town/Country : canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits :
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About tellyc : Eighteen & addicted to Pepsi & the Big Bang theory!
My life dream is to be a counsellor & meet Sheldon cooper.

tellyc's last visitors

TREJO9XPassiveAggresiveEcudanieljdjackdaniel4PresAgentjerryjpratikp03

tellyc's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of tellyc's badges

tellyc's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39883) - you deserved it (3497)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took a nap in my car right after finishing up at work. I was woken up by a hobo sitting in the passenger seat, watching me sleep. Apparently, he'd managed to unlock the door with a wire hanger. FML

#21027083
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43960) - you deserved it (4921)

On 01/13/2014 at 10:31pm - misc - by ShelterForTheHomless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML

#21024822
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52167) - you deserved it (6269)

On 01/11/2014 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mum and I were referred to as "ladies". I'm happy for her, since she always complains about looking masculine. However, I would still like to be called a gentleman, seeing as how I am one. FML

#21000124
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38172) - you deserved it (2788)

On 12/21/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by FML (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my 7 year old daughter explained to a taxi driver that she was born from my "vagina that doesn't have hair". He winked creepily at me and said, "I bet it doesn't." FML

#20970485
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40224) - you deserved it (4980)

On 11/25/2013 at 6:42pm - misc - by jazopalchris (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

#20955991
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42874) - you deserved it (11197)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML

#20937069
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36133) - you deserved it (3610)

On 10/28/2013 at 6:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

#20922179
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44109) - you deserved it (3673)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm - love - by highlydisgusted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I officially became a divorced marriage counselor. FML

#20877295
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42834) - you deserved it (6992)

On 09/11/2013 at 5:35pm - work - by natattack - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked out a guy at work that I really like. He just stared at me and said, "Honestly? I'd rather smash my balls with a mallet. No offense." FML

#20828908
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46543) - you deserved it (3806)

On 08/09/2013 at 10:54am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport, that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML

#20703790
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57253) - you deserved it (7234)

On 06/03/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by VDM (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I asked my dermatologist why my acne has been getting worse, despite following her directions and spending hundreds of dollars on medicine. She just shrugged and told me they can't actually cure my acne. However, they can prescribe me a bunch of stuff and hope one works. FML

#20700784
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45112) - you deserved it (4854)

On 06/02/2013 at 6:53am - health - by WtfDidIPayYouForThen - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss told me to go outside and take part in the company's stupid Harlem Shake video. When I declined, he threatened to fire me if I didn't take part. I ended up being the guy who had to furiously pelvic thrust before the music dropped. FML

#20518411
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34408) - you deserved it (5947)

On 02/23/2013 at 2:32am - work - by mypelvishurts - United States (California)

Today, I finished my shift at the nursing home. There was too much snow on the roads, so most of us had to stay overnight. Not only did I not get to go home, I also got stuck sleeping in the same bed that a resident had died in the night before. FML

#20504938
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28685) - you deserved it (1896)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:20pm - work - by death bed (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

#20451265
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26313) - you deserved it (5340)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by it's just a name (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: