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tehman117

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tehman117

11Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1031
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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tehman117's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I crossed the street without holding her hand. FML

#21417560
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16643) - you deserved it (1983)

On 05/29/2015 at 11:05am - love - by GlueAndCarrots - Canada (Ontario)

Today, for our anniversary, I had made a small treasure hunt for my boyfriend, tying roses with notes of poetry to lampposts across campus to lead him to where we would have a romantic dinner. He couldn't find it because people had stolen the roses, or simply ripped them to pieces and thrown them away. FML

#21417526
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20670) - you deserved it (5425)

On 05/29/2015 at 9:04am - love - by Headless (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my daughter cried for ages after finding out that Nick Amaro was written out of Law and Order: SVU. She barely reacted when I told her that her mom and I are getting a divorce. FML

#21417105
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19526) - you deserved it (2400)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:40am - misc - by svunimportant - United States (Kentucky)

Today, one of my students tried to bribe me $200 to change his grade. When I said no and told him he was lucky I didn't report him, he went to the dean and told him I offered to change his grade for money. I'm now suspended and under investigation. FML

#21416617
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31058) - you deserved it (2652)

On 05/27/2015 at 12:25pm - work - by UN4 (man) - United States

Today, my dad stood by and nodded in agreement as my sister told me that my clinical depression is "getting REALLY old." FML

#21416569
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24602) - you deserved it (2831)

On 05/27/2015 at 9:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I had to write my own notice for enforced redundancy because my boss just went on a two week vacation. He told me to just forge his signature and that, if I wouldn't do it, he'd just make something up to dismiss me on codes of conduct. FML

Today, after a broken smoke detector in my home caused the fire department to come, I got an angry visit from my neighbor who was upset because she had parked in front of a fire hydrant and got a ticket. She demands that I pay it, "or else." FML

#21415473
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28595) - you deserved it (2050)

On 05/25/2015 at 12:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I saw my uncle, whom I have not seen in five years, at a family gathering. His reaction to seeing me? "Holy SHIT you have BOOBS! The guys must be all over you!" I awkwardly replied, "No..." Then he muttered, "I know I would." FML

Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML

#21414899
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30524) - you deserved it (1897)

On 05/24/2015 at 11:15am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said she wanted to accept, but that she'd basically have to get her mom's permission first. Apparently the answer was no. The worst thing is that she really is this unhealthily dependent on her mom, and probably wasn't lying about needing her permission. FML

#21414249
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25990) - you deserved it (2808)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:44pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my aunt, whom I live with, told me she is going to move out and demanded her half of the rent back, as she only spent two days a week there. When I told her that's not how rent works, she called my mom to tell her what a failure she had raised. Her own sons are unemployed drug addicts. FML

#21414120
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26942) - you deserved it (1693)

On 05/22/2015 at 6:14pm - money - by Failure (woman) - Germany (Sachsen-Anhalt)

Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML

#21414003
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29060) - you deserved it (1981)

On 05/22/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by homo fuckofftus (man) - United States (California)

Today, a new employee started at our office. She's about 18, barely does any work, chews gum loudly, has no manners, and happens to sit right next to me. She also threatens to report me for harassment whenever I politely ask her to not bash my chair with the back of her chair. FML

#21413003
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28147) - you deserved it (1906)

On 05/20/2015 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Cyprus (Paphos)

Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend at work. Because she was "bored and didn't feel like seeing me" she thought it would be funny to call security and claim that I was stalking her. There is now a picture of my face at her workplace, and anytime I "pester her again" the cops will show up. FML

#21408859
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28984) - you deserved it (3835)

On 05/12/2015 at 8:53am - intimacy - by Darryl - Australia (Queensland)

Today, once again, I explained that yes, I'm Russian. No, I'm not a communist. No, I don't pray to a picture of Putin riding a bear. And no, I don't have any vodka on me. FML

#21408243
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (3014)

On 05/11/2015 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)



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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

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