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teentee401's favorite FMLs
by pierced / 05/01/2016 at 1:56pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/22/2016 at 11:26pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend, when his doorbell rang. He said it was his friend and that he'd be back soon. He shut off his video feed but forgot to mute his audio. A few minutes later, I heard him and some orgasm-faking girl getting it on in the background. FML
by Anonymous / 04/21/2016 at 4:28pm / United States (California) / Love
by BenFiggy / 04/21/2016 at 9:28am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
by Hairy Cheek / 04/15/2016 at 12:27am / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, while opening up to a few friends about how I was sexually abused as a child, one of them blurted "Pics or it didn't happen." How did the others react? With outrage? No, just with awkward chuckling. FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2016 at 10:04am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I overheard a coworker talking about going to what sounded like a dentist's appointment. As she left later, I jokingly said "Remember to open wide!" Turned out her appointment was with her OB/GYN, not a dentist. FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2016 at 11:44am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, my friend invited me to his boxing club for the first time. Since I'm somewhat short and scrawny-looking, he was worried that the workout would be too difficult for me. I waved him off and told him that I was tougher than I looked. Five minutes into class, I sprained my ankle. FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2016 at 8:29am / United States (Missouri) / Health
Today, my friend asked me for advice on how to break up with her boyfriend. I've never done it before so I googled it, my own boyfriend happened to walk in and now isn't speaking to me. He won't believe me when I say it was "for a friend." FML
by howtobreakup / 04/11/2016 at 12:39pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/02/2016 at 11:48am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
Today, I'm in training at an animal shelter. There's an adorable tiny kitten there, which my boss said not to touch it because it's feral. "No way he's dangerous" I said, reaching into the cage to pet it. It struck like a cobra and tore up my arm. My first on-the-job injury is from a KITTEN. FML
by Anonymous / 03/25/2016 at 1:05pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
by mel / 03/25/2016 at 9:20am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the doctor's after over a week of feeling extremely tired and having headaches. His advice? "When I'm tired I drink coffee. You should drink coffee." Somehow, I don't think that was worth $60. FML
by Anonymous / 03/24/2016 at 11:14pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Health
Today, while vacationing, a small boy asked to see the baby I was holding, wrapped in a blanket. I showed him, and his face reflexively scrunched up. The boy's mother came and apologized to me. Her face scrunched up too. FML
by NotAnUglyBaby / 03/22/2016 at 6:40pm / Mexico (Veracruz-Llave) / Holidays
Today, a man came by with a large drink and sat next to me in the bus terminal. In all his wisdom, he tried setting it between the seats. Naturally, it spilled all over me. I now have to sit with a soaked pair of pants and a wet carry on from Nashville to Atlanta. The bus trip is 5 hours long. FML
by sodapants / 03/22/2016 at 4:38pm / United States (California) / Transportation