teamlightskin

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teamlightskin

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 December 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2196
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About teamlightskin : Imperfection is beauty

teamlightskin's page activity

Visits<b>2simz</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 2:08am<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 10:47pm<b>TxAsMaD3</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 6:50pm<b>dom_g</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 12:35am<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 6:17pm<b>obewonstrangeone</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 7:45am<b>Liv3366</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 12:13pm<b>lui_pg</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 11:06pm<b>wil1029</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:53am<b>Roozb</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 6:05pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 12:13am<b>Spencyy</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 12:49am<b>SaniK</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 7:51pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 7:44am<b>eminemineminem</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:49pm<b>beautifulmymy</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 7:16pm<b>achillesJC123</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 1:22pm<b>Isaiah80008</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 10:13am

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 6:13am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 1:53am

teamlightskin's FML badges

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teamlightskin's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I went for our 20 week scan and found out we're having a girl. The first thing he said to me was, "The next one better be a boy or I'm leaving you". FML

by Naomi / 11/10/2013 at 5:28am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

by f / 11/09/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, somebody broke into my car, just to steal the obviously fake $1,000,000 bill hanging from my rear-view mirror. FML

by jsyn / 11/09/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Connecticut) / Money

Today, I was in a public restroom when my almost-2-year-old figured out how to open the door and run out. Half-a-dozen strangers watched me scramble to pull up my pants and moon everyone before running after her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/07/2013 at 10:23am / United States / Kids

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

by Grandson / 11/07/2013 at 12:52am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

by awkward / 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

by animal lover... / 10/05/2013 at 6:34pm / Animals

Today, I moved into a new house, I couldn't help but notice a car alarm going off, so I investigated my neighbors. Turns out it's their bird. It imitates chainsaws, car alarms, and much more. FML

by Mike Messenger / 10/05/2013 at 9:51am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I was on a dinner date with a guy I really like. I guess I was on my phone too much because halfway through the date he sent me a text saying how much my half of the bill would be. FML

by Lilly / 10/02/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, my dad asked me to stop calling him "dad" because it’s too weird for his girlfriend’s kids to hear, because they call him dad. FML

by meens42 / 09/30/2013 at 4:04am / United States / Kids

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

by wombats / 09/28/2013 at 10:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband refused to let our 7-week-old daughter have a pacifier, because he doesn't want her growing up to be a "whore." FML

Today, I realized the only "person" I have talked to in the last two days is Siri. FML

by me / 09/22/2013 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

by oops / 09/20/2013 at 9:30pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy