Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

teamlightskin

Search for a member

teamlightskin

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 December 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1001
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About teamlightskin : Imperfection is beauty

teamlightskin's page activity

Visits<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 6:00pm<b>abattior</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 9:06pm<b>MrKronos</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 2:40am<b>sh07</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 4:01pm<b>cats54321</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 10:47pm<b>Peter_Ohnigian</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 9:49am<b>AlexaWuzHere</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 7:56pm<b>tartar18</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:46am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:26pm<b>KatlynBrooke</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:24am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 3:03pm<b>telli164</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 8:55am<b>mat_sib</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 2:16pm<b>Kiki242</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 11:34am<b>temoch</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 1:51pm<b>jake_lq91</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 12:45am<b>bbanmen</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:48am<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 12:11pm

teamlightskin's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of teamlightskin's badges

teamlightskin's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I went for our 20 week scan and found out we're having a girl. The first thing he said to me was, "The next one better be a boy or I'm leaving you". FML

#20952357
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50266) - you deserved it (4465)

On 11/10/2013 at 5:28am - kids - by Naomi - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

#20951750
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62599) - you deserved it (4591)

On 11/09/2013 at 6:30pm - intimacy - by f (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, somebody broke into my car, just to steal the obviously fake $1,000,000 bill hanging from my rear-view mirror. FML

#20951747
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42827) - you deserved it (10376)

On 11/09/2013 at 6:27pm - money - by jsyn (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was in a public restroom when my almost-2-year-old figured out how to open the door and run out. Half-a-dozen strangers watched me scramble to pull up my pants and moon everyone before running after her. FML

#20948920
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41288) - you deserved it (3891)

On 11/07/2013 at 10:23am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

#20948659
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45053) - you deserved it (4110)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Grandson - United States (California)

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

#20947922
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42611) - you deserved it (3862)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

#20908715
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42803) - you deserved it (3587)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:34pm - animals - by animal lover... -

Today, I moved into a new house, I couldn't help but notice a car alarm going off, so I investigated my neighbors. Turns out it's their bird. It imitates chainsaws, car alarms, and much more. FML

#20908147
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42797) - you deserved it (3051)

On 10/05/2013 at 9:51am - animals - by Mike Messenger - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on a dinner date with a guy I really like. I guess I was on my phone too much because halfway through the date he sent me a text saying how much my half of the bill would be. FML

#20904456
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16521) - you deserved it (109259)

On 10/02/2013 at 8:43am - love - by Lilly (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my dad asked me to stop calling him "dad" because it’s too weird for his girlfriend’s kids to hear, because they call him dad. FML

#20901637
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52406) - you deserved it (2502)

On 09/30/2013 at 4:04am - kids - by meens42 - United States

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

Today, my husband refused to let our 7-week-old daughter have a pacifier, because he doesn't want her growing up to be a "whore." FML

#20891477
166 comments

Today, I realized the only "person" I have talked to in the last two days is Siri. FML

#20891258
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35765) - you deserved it (7816)

On 09/22/2013 at 9:34am - misc - by me - United States (Texas)

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

#20889450
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64797) - you deserved it (6264)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:30pm - intimacy - by oops - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

#20889434
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50975) - you deserved it (34291)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: